Goodbye Stranger

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#1 Sep 24 - 3PM
jenks0718
jenks0718's picture

Goodbye Stranger

Wow...you knew from speaking with me when we first met that I loved to write stories. Is that why you created such a complex character for me to fall in love with and then turn around and change into someone else that I felt I never knew? Were you playing a role in a book I have not yet written or were you allowing me to live a nightmare so I could create a novel of scary proportions? Either way, it is surreal that I never real knew you at all and that is overwhelming to me after all this time.

I try to wrap my mind around all the things that have happened over the past year and a half, but it is too overwhelming for me...How someone can lie to my face with such sincerity in their eyes is very, very scary.... When all of my friends were telling me to RUN and be SMARY I was closing my eyes to the bullshit. When my own intuition was screaming at me to LET YOU GO, I ignored it because you told me I was insane and psycho. You sat on the bed in the hotel and looked at me with those coniving eyes and said, "Admit it Jane, you are gullible..." How that heart my PRIDE. To KNOW that this is what you THINK OF ME. Gullible Jane who believed all the stories and lies... Well, I am not so gullible now...

I know the TRUTH. ALL OF IT... I know you hid a girlfriend in NYC, I know you were arrested for credit card fraud, I know you stole your best friends girlfriend and got her pregnant, I know you wanted to live two different lives in two different states and when I got CLOSE to the truth you discarded me....Only to come back AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN and play with my head and my heart. Your fake tears in your eyes replaying our memories to make me fall victim once more...

The truth is, I dont want to be a victim of you. I think more of myself then that. Its YOU I feel sorry for. YOU ARE YOUR OWN VICTIM. The day you left me in that casino and discarded me with no regard to my feelings, you killed whatever image I had left of you as a human being. You are a robot...an emotionless robot who will never have one OUNCE of the happiness and joy I have in my life. A life surrounded by TRUE friends and family that love me and wonderful children who make me proud EVERY DAY.

Did you break me? Well...maybe you bended me in ways I never thought I could and it damn near FELT like I broke, but I would NEVER give you the satisfaction to think you brought me down. I go on each day smelling the fresh air,kissing my babies, laughing with friends, reminising with my parents, and thanking God that he delivered a POWERFUL lesson to me in the form of a narc...I will NEVER settle again.

I would wish you well, but I just dont give a fuck about you enough to do that.

J

Jul 23 - 5PM
Niels
Niels's picture

These words resonate - they