Calling all narc mind readers!

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#1 January 8, 2014 - 10:56am
Gettinghappy
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Calling all narc mind readers!

OK...I am doing exttemely well and feeling very strong, but I need a little insight from those of you who may have experienced a similar situation to mine.

You can read more details under the Goodbye Letters "Goodbye MD" but here is a quick recap: Met N at work at a very low point in life. Love-bombed, idealized, devalued, silent treatment, devaluesd, silent treatment, discard, hover, repeat for over a year. Went from strong, confident woman to a weak, pathetic, crazy mess. Spinning, spinning, obsessing, obsessing. Lost friends, unhappy at home, drank, depressed, bad things happen. Began to research and learned he is a textbook N. Cognitive dissonance. Denial. Reading. Learning. Accepting. 4 months ago N quits working at my company!!! New friends, happy at work, happy at home, good things start happening, NC, clarity. Today I was told he is coming back to my company in my department. Spinning, panic, anger. He has so many people fooled. Epiphany: I don't want him to come back. I am not holding on to any false hope anymore. It is only a problem if I allow it to be. He cannot control me or manipulate me again. I am stronger, wiser and see him for what he is.

This is where I need some guidance. Part of me thinks I should quit but part of me thinks this is my chance to have the last word by not letting him affect me. I am an over-thinker and a bit of a control freak, so please humor me on this question: Considering he has made little to no attempt to hover me since he left, should I expect him to try to worm his way back in again? I'm strong, but it still concerns me. Have any of you been in a similar situation?

January 10, 2014 - 1:16pm
MaryLee
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Can you make a positive career move?

January 10, 2014 - 2:04pm (Reply to #12)
Gettinghappy
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You are right.

January 12, 2014 - 7:10pm (Reply to #13)
MaryLee
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Yes, avoid him...

January 12, 2014 - 9:02pm (Reply to #14)
Gettinghappy
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Thank you!

January 8, 2014 - 1:04pm
talktothehand
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1gettinghappy

January 8, 2014 - 1:28pm (Reply to #10)
Gettinghappy
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Two words: My husband. Out of

January 8, 2014 - 11:50am
Hunter
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As I say .. Life is about

January 8, 2014 - 11:42am
Callie
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Support

January 8, 2014 - 12:36pm (Reply to #3)
Gettinghappy
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Thanks Callie. I don't want

January 8, 2014 - 1:23pm (Reply to #4)
talktothehand
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1gettinghappy

January 8, 2014 - 1:37pm (Reply to #5)
spinning
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Ditto, talk, and

spinning

January 8, 2014 - 11:20pm (Reply to #6)
Gettinghappy
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It's my move

January 9, 2014 - 9:00am (Reply to #7)
spinning
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I know, 1getting,

spinning

January 8, 2014 - 11:24am
Janie53
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1gettinghappy