I fell in love with my co-worker and now see she is a narcissist

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#1 April 21, 2017 - 4:02pm
Dan
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I fell in love with my co-worker and now see she is a narcissist

This all started 3 years ago. I was unhappy in my marriage, and my beautiful co- worker and I became friends. We talked about our background, our work ethics, our likes and dislikes. I found that my marriage was to a woman who was emotionally unavailable and unwilling to talk about subjects I was interested in. Pretty soon me and my co-worker were working closer together, more projects, more time spent together- the perfect storm. She would text me in the morning, we wold have lunch 3-4 times a week, she would call me at night 1-2 times a week. She had a strange relationship with her boyfriend. Went to his place on the weekend, but during the week stayed at her place. Even though there residences were not that far apart. Talked about how bad he was treating her, his untrustworthiness, etc.. So here I come along, the white knight. Im thinking she's just lonely, because she tells me I am the exact opposite of the boyfriend. However, 2 years in I get the Dear John email at Christmas break that she intends to stay with him and I should leave her alone. Work becomes very awkward for the 2 of us. She eventually comes around and we remain friends, all the time Im thinking I have a chance. Nope, Im the girlfriend who she vents and complains to.
It takes me that long and 3 therapists to finally figure out she is a narcissist. I was completely blind, thought she cared for me. We never did anything physical, but the emotional connection was incredibly strong. I have read numerous books and am now trying no contact, however I see her daily and it is very difficult not to get the anxious feelings and emotional welling up of tears. We do have to talk about work related matters, but not personal stuff.
Has anyone on here had to deal with loving a female co-worker who is a narcissist and then trying to go no contact and succeeding?

April 25, 2017 - 1:18pm
Domo
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Feel lucky

April 26, 2017 - 8:08pm (Reply to #2)
Dan
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Co worker

April 27, 2017 - 5:41am (Reply to #3)
Domo
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Hi Dan

November 10, 2017 - 4:51am (Reply to #4)
ryan_vice
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She's trash

Cheers,
Alex