really struggling

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#1 Dec 10 - 8AM
rebeccawho
rebeccawho's picture

really struggling

hey, guys. I pretty much am in the darkest place of my life. Started on the roller coaster with him about seven ears ago, married him, have tried every single possible way to make our marriage good. to be close to him. It seems that the harder i tried the worse it became. I am desperately wanting to see the light at the end of the tunnel, but I think that I was deluding myself when i obtained a restraining order and filed for divorce. I felt so strong at the time. That was July. Now I think that it was just my last ditch effort to make him think I was serious and maybe I really wasn't. i want to be done, but it feels impossible. My mind and heart seem to do what they want and I don't have control over it. i think maybe I AM crazy. That I AM unlovable and that all of the things he has told me are true. I have read many blogs about my situation on various sites. I know that he is a classic narcissistic psychopath. But, what does that make me? That is what I am trying to figure out.

Dec 11 - 9AM
Used
Used's picture

rebeccawho.

Dec 10 - 9PM
Lookforward
Lookforward's picture

I would talk to Goldie,

Dec 11 - 1PM (Reply to #2)
confusedenough
confusedenough's picture

Hi Rebecca I have just read

Dec 12 - 7AM (Reply to #3)
rebeccawho
rebeccawho's picture

It is not the length of time

rebecca