How do I cope?

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#1 Mar 3 - 12PM
Tryingtobestrong
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How do I cope?

I think I'm a recent victim of an N. When we met he was everything I ever wanted. He would bring me dinner and coffee to work. He would buy me expensive things pay off some of my bills and when I lost my job unexpectedly he helped me plan and told me not to get into any hurry because he would take care of me. he pay my bills, gave me spending money and in return he lived with me for 3 months but he paid for everything. we had wonderful insightful talks or so I thought. He gave me career advice personal advice with issues that I have been dealing with all of my adult life it was easy to talk to him easy to tell him all of my sorrows from my past and now I think he just wanted to know those things on how to manipulate me. He told me he would not abandon me he got me settled in a new city because he didn't want me to far away from him because I was unlike any other woman he's ever known. He brought me furniture and continue to speak of our relationship as we were together. Now that is the idealization phase. The last two months he has been secretive extremely vague and was in contact with his ex the entire time. He would tell me how unstable she was and the he hoped that she would find someone new but he could not cut ties with her because he felt responsible for her and her children so he could not let her go. I have voiced my concerns with this and suggested that he set boundaries with her. But like I said he was very secretive and hiding his phone more constantly talking about how his privacy is his most valuable thing. So after I moved and he was supposed to come see me he declined to Tom's to come see me so I suggested I'll go see him. He did not respond with a yes or a no so I assumed that he was okay with me coming so I took the long drive all the way to where he was only to find that he was not there. He would not respond to my text or phone calls so I sent the break up text. Hours later he replied with I'm unable to respect his privacy and for me to have no further contact. He refused and ignored majority of my texts however he indicated that he regrets that we did not work out and that he didn't have time to be distracted and wished me good luck in my success.
He never addressed why he never responded to me why he never stopped me from coming to see him nothing just ended it. So I was devastated I sent several text stating I wanted to discuss the situation I wanted to work out a resolution I wanted him in my life I needed to understand what was going on and I was ignored. My question is what do I do now? I still care for him I've read a lot of the post and information on narcissist but I still want him to choose me I still want him to be the person that I knew the first two months we were together. Oh really thought he was different which is probably what he wanted me to think. And I'm just hurting and wanting to understand? Will he contact me again? Will he want to be friends?

Mar 4 - 11AM
Tryingtobestrong
Tryingtobestrong's picture

I came to think he was a

Mar 4 - 11AM
Goldie
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I'm sorry for your pain