Boy Does the Anger Stage last a Looooong time

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It comes and goes with me but i have a couple of months more nc than you .. bloody well done for 6 weeks . I have had a calm few weeks not having the anger , i still dont so fingers crossed in moving foward from that stage of grief .. But boy oh boy when i was in full rage about 2 months into nc (and i hate to say it lasted for about 4 months if not five ) It was clothes ripping , hair pulling RAGE , god knows how i didnt go round there and kill him , i let rip at him once in that time when i bumpped into him on a girls night out and man did he get it in the neck . He blamed my girl friend for winding me up .. she said "you have dont a good enough job at that , she didnt need my help " ... love her ... I would get terrible supermarket rage , that was the only place it came out in public and when i say came out i dont expect anyone noticed it was more in my head , if someone got in my way with their cart i would freak out .. i spent alot of time with children as that calmed me right down and at the begining of the summer all i wanted to go was go to the gym and sit by the pool which i did most mornings and that really helped me sitting in the sun like lady muck but boy it set me up for the day . Driving in the car would start off my ranting too , sometimes out loud but mostly in my head as i would piture him infrount of me and i was saying all the clever stuff i was too scared to to his face .At the end of july i brought my narrow boat and i used my energy painting it and making curtains and just making it look lovely and i think by the end of august i was comming out of it , but then he hovered and it kicked off again for a few weeks but that has died down too . Last night i had a wobble but i think it was part of the grief , where i had been so angry at him l fogot to feel that the reason i was angry at him was because i loved him so much and that love came up to the serface on hearing that the ow has gone (rummor but from a good sorse )but i went shopping and got new beding and a big wooly jumper and now i dont want to contact him ... its true it gets easyer with time , you just have to do the things that make you feel good , in normal life i would have never wasted whole mornings sitting by the pool and i wouldnt go out and buy a new jumpper that i didnt really need but theses are not normal times .. so yes the anger can last a while but im living prof it gets sooo much better , its just a case of putting youre head down and get through it .

P T S D....Post-traumatic stress disorder is a type of anxiety disorder. It can occur after you've seen or experienced a traumatic event that involved the threat of injury or death. In some of our cases, emotional murder. Repeated "reliving" of the event, which disturbs day-to-day activity •Flashback episodes, where the event seems to be happening again and again •Recurrent distressing memories of the event •Repeated dreams of the event •Physical reactions to situations that remind you of the traumatic event •Irritability or outbursts of anger In some of our cases the EVENT is: THE NARC Treatment aims to reduce symptoms by encouraging you to recall the event, express your feelings, and gain some sense of control over the experience. In some cases, expressing grief helps to complete the necessary mourning process. Support groups, where people who have had similar experiences can share their feelings, are helpful. In some of our cases mourning the death of the illusion. https://health.google.com/health/ref/Post-traumatic+stress+disorder There were times being with N was enjoyable, positive, passionate, hard not to miss those moments.