I was spewing things out that I wasn't even aware of...
He'd say something and I would blurt out Your f'ing trying to gaslight me!!!
Before I knew about narcissistic rage, the night I found out about his cheating, I threatened to slam my face into the wall if he dare utter a sound - I instructed him to come here get some things and leave - he left quiet a a mouse.
After I had him leave, I went through the trying to be a better pretzel phase - you know the trying to work it out phase?
It was during that phase that all the Narc stuff came out full blown.
I hadn't put the pieces together yet - but somehow...I truly believe divine intervention was at work because in looking back, I did all the things they suggest one does not to provoke? AND I had no prior knowledge of Narcissism...
Of course, I fell to pieces AFTER I took a breath, started reading etc...then it ALL hit me - I was kinda in a daze, robotic but doing all the "right" things but not being aware?
I even read somewhere that one way to rid yourself of a narcissist is to become very forgetful, stop tending to their needs - by default I was in a depression but didn't know why?...It WAS HIM!!! and as a result everything went to shambles...
DIVINE INTERVENTION - it drove him nuts...LOL
Actually, no that didn't, but I guess it helped the Discarding of me accelerate...had I stayed in the dark, God knows what condition I'd be in....
Some kind of divine intervention methinks