Do N's wonder why we have NC or don't they care?

22 posts / 0 new

#1 Sep 8 - 7PM

thisisnotfun

Do N's wonder why we have NC or don't they care?

I was wondering, do N's even think "Hey, I haven't spoke to this person" or don't they care? It has been almost 2 weeks and I haven't heard a peep from him. I guess, that hurts even more. I want to ignore him, but he is already ignoring me. ??????

#2 Sep 8 - 8PM

cupcake (not verified)

NC about them

Mine would discard me for an average of 2 weeks. Then come back full on. If I didn't respond to a message within an hour "where are you where are you" he would be calling constantly. at the time I thought I guess he cares a lot about me but now I know better. He cared about losing his supply nothing more. And I agree with Cynth they believe they are King and expect us to be waiting at home in the dark crying while they get to screw God knows what and how many. And if we did that to them...wow can you imagine! My N was SO jealous and possesive even though he had a girlfriend and a mistress (me) and probably online porn partners. I hate them. They get to discard us and I know how you guys feel I would be so excited to see his name again! During those 2 weeks I would 'hate him' and prepare to never talk to him again or send an aloof text message but it never happened. He would call or write I would get excited and jump. I understand the emotions I hate him so much and sitll want to be contacted by him! They have us addicted on the adrenalin of the high and the low, the push and the pull. I hate it. Keep going for NC it's the onyl way to keep you sane!

#3 Sep 8 - 9PM (Reply to #20)

Beachcolors

I think this is so true

They do think 100% that they are THE KING. Mine actually called himself THE KING...of course he also called out his own name during sex. I though he was just being funny but now not so much. Part of the reason i blocked him is so i wouldn't have to see his name or number or hear his ring tone. When i had a missed call i would hold my breath waiting to see if it was him. I wanted him to go away but I also felt good when he contacted me because it made me feel like I had some power. It was so hard not to respond...it's still hard like today. We just have to remember that everything is fake to them. Everything they do is part of their game.

#4 Sep 8 - 9PM (Reply to #21)

thisisnotfun

You are so right. We need

You are so right. We need to keep telling ourselves that... We will heal and move on, be happy and they will keep hurting women and never be happy.

#5 Sep 8 - 8PM

destiny (not verified)

I asked my XN once if he

I asked my XN once if he realized that both times he vanished it was two weeks.....he said he didnt pay any attention to the time. Later he told me next time it will be longer than two weeks. I dont think mine will contact me this go around though..bc he really seemed done...and i am in therapy and working thru it...but still i do think I would feel better if he called and i could ignore. Last time though he would be annoying and call and not leave msgs...kinda like a stalker. it will be one full month for me tomorrow :-)

#6 Sep 8 - 11PM (Reply to #17)

tasha

mines done too..

Mine can longer contact me or find me. His mask fell off and I saw him for what he was-a pyschopath/narcissist. It's a complexed story, bottom line-he dicarded me and now there there is no way he can 'recycle' me. It would be nice to hear him say sorry-But I know that will never happen-he has no couscience or empathy.So I just get on. Mine stalks me online. Dumb arse!!-like I don't know it's him!

#7 Sep 9 - 6AM (Reply to #18)

Barbara (not verified)

tasha - FYI

All PSYCHOPATHS are narcissists not all NARCISSISTS are psychopaths there's a difference he can be a narcissistic psychopath but NOT The opposite almost all of them stalk in some way - the still consider you their property! ICK! ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck

#8 Sep 8 - 9PM (Reply to #16)

thisisnotfun

Good for you. I would love

Good for you. I would love to ignore him just for once. I'm also in therapy hope to get rid of any thoughts of him.

#9 Sep 8 - 8PM

cynthia (not verified)

they care

THEY CARE but not for reasons of any emotions attached to it, they worry about their supply and how dare you not be there waiting for them when they call, I am King.

#10 Sep 8 - 8PM

quietude (not verified)

I think

I think it just makes them angry since that's really the only emotion they have, followed by how effed up we must be not to want talk to the Master of the Universe.

#11 Sep 8 - 8PM (Reply to #2)

thisisnotfun

I guess, I wanted to be able

I guess, I wanted to be able to ignore him if he called or texted. He hasn't, so I'm at a loss. I won't contact him as I know he most likely has someone else. He has been on Match the entire time we dated. He told me I could date him as long as I knew he was dating other women. Dirt bag..... Gosh, this is awful.... One minute I'm pissed and hate him and the next, I'm hoping he calls. I wasn't like this with my Xhusband.

#12 Sep 8 - 8PM (Reply to #11)

NanC (not verified)

why do we even want them to

why do we even want them to call??? I know, it's sicking how they can still control us from afar! I hate to think about all the WASTED TIME I will never get back. He used me, wrecked my credit, and threw me like yesterday's trash and then has the gall to bring his new gf with him to pick up our daughter.

#13 Sep 9 - 2PM (Reply to #13)

annamarie

same here

Yea, I wonder why I miss my ex N. And I never in my life experienced something like this. O I thought I was crazy in and out of the relationship. My whole life was turned upside down. He used me too. When I look back I thought he really cared, but he was just using me. I guess since I couldn't take it any long and snapped the day he left. He had my head so twisted I couldn't think straight. And that's not me. I have a big mouth and I was telling my kids father about this and he couldn't understand why I let him get away with it. He said, that's not you and you are on point with situations. However, the N doesn't care. We have a lot of mutual friends so sometimes I get information I don't want. And have to tell these people not to talk to me about him. Which has made it much harder for the NC. And he just moved on like I never was never there. O he has a new girlfriend and I struggle with that because I meant nothing. I know he is a sick man and it's just ego driven. However, I started feeling sorry for the new one. O he's gonna destroy her and she has know clue. One good thing is some people that know him told me he has treated like crap too. I mean people he was friends with. So I know it's not me. But he doesn't care and yes it hurts, but I know he will never change. And it's all about him. He makes me sick how he gets away with it.

They never change. He will build you up and then suck you dry!!!!!!

#14 Sep 8 - 8PM (Reply to #12)

thisisnotfun

They are trash. NC I keep

They are trash. NC I keep telling myself. I read these stories and think, they are all the same, they will never change.....

#15 Sep 8 - 8PM (Reply to #3)

Beachcolors

Oh but wait....

He will contact you again.....I have had NC for since July 11th, with all his numbers and emails blocked. He called me from a place of business on July 25th just to tell me that he doesn't love me or want me......then last night I got this stupid text of random people eating dinner on a deck by the water. He wasn't even in the pic...or anyone I even know. It looks like a still from a webcam. I have no idea how he got through to my cell. Your N will contact you it will just take time. Before this NC the longest mine went without contacting me was 28 days. This time he went all most two months.

#16 Sep 8 - 8PM (Reply to #4)

thisisnotfun

I just want to ignore him so

I just want to ignore him so bad.

#17 Sep 8 - 8PM (Reply to #5)

Beachcolors

I know

I did have moments of thinking OMG he hasn't called I guess he's over me now...i was glad but sad at the same time. But know this....when your phone rings and you see his number it will be so hard to ignore him. I have really had to fight not calling mine all day. It really pisses me off because he doesn't know it but he has at least made me think about him all day. It makes me so mad.

#18 Sep 8 - 8PM (Reply to #6)

thisisnotfun

Gosh, that is how I feel

Gosh, that is how I feel everyday. My kids told me if I talk to him again they will never talk to me. They hate him. They have seen what he has done to me. I can't believe we are allowing them to still consume us.....

#19 Sep 8 - 9PM (Reply to #7)

quietude (not verified)

thisisnotfun

This is interesting! After being D&D'd 3 times, my adult son (not his) told me that if I took my ex back, just expect that I'll have a crazy person in my life - and he won't come over. And if I ever got involved with anyone like him ever again, he will not support me. No more smiling and gritting teeth for him. I don't blame him one bit, plus it would kill me to not be as close as I am with my son. I cherish my kids so much, they are my strength.

#20 Sep 8 - 9PM (Reply to #10)

thisisnotfun

I agree with you about our

I agree with you about our kids. Both of my children 21 and 23 saw what a jerk he was from day one. Both can't believe I would put up with type of behavior. My daughter is watching me.. Not a great example for her. My son also sees that men can treat women like crap and they still love them. Not a great message to send to my kids.... I'm so close to them. I raised them by myself. This is the first relationship I have had since my divorce. Wow!

#21 Sep 8 - 9PM (Reply to #8)

Barbara (not verified)

care less

they only care about THEMSELVES and loss of supply they could CARE LESS WHY you N/C them or even that you are hurt. That means NOTHING to them no matter WHAT THEY SAY!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck

#22 Sep 10 - 12AM (Reply to #9)

James (not verified)

NC Please...

Interesting thing about NC is that whenever â€œwe go NCâ€ they see it as a type of punishment like the way they too punished us by not contacting us for weeks or days. Because itâ€™s â€œAll about Himâ€ or Her they never figure out that we need NC to heal from this dysfunctional relationship. Also to note because again they see it only as â€œpunishmentâ€ they believe sooner or later you will either forgive or forget. In short our concept and understanding of NC is one thing and part of our reality but their NC toward us is just part of there insanity and fantasy. This I believe explain why they just donâ€™t get it and have a very hard time accepting NO CONTACT for LIFE! http://james-personalitydisorder.blogspot.com/

Path Forward Buy Now Reviews
All About Her Buy Now Reviews
All About Him Buy Now Reviews