Q: "How can he be so sweet one minute and so nasty the next?? I DON"T UNDERSTAND!!!"
A: Because he is a SADISTIC PSYCHOPATH
Q: Who treats people this way???"
A: A psychopath who finds easy prey.
Cherryblossom, there is a BIG lesson in all of this. Did you see the movie "Groundhog Day"? The guy has to keep repeating the same horrible day over and over and over until he becomes enlightened and finally learns the lesson that the universe was trying to teach him.
I know the lesson you need to learn.
Once you learn to respect yourself and stop taking scraps, he will fall out of your orbit. You will no longer be a beacon to him, nor him a beacon to you.
It is so hard not to fall for the "sincere" words of an apologetic psychopath. They seem so real. I know. But they are not, never were, and never ever will be. Ever. He LOVES toying with your emotions. He knows how badly you want to see him. And you know what? Even if you did send him naked pictures, he'd wiggle out of seeing you (that's his history.)
NC NC NC NC NC NC NC NC
Love and respect yourself.
You are so right. lol. Funny how you know him so well =)
He would have SO come up with some dumb ass excuse and left me high and dry again anyway. BUT guess what? I didn't send him pictures AND I ignored his text.
I have been noticing since we have been back in contact that he is trying to make it to the way it was before... with me kissing his ass all the time.
Thank Goodness I have been in therapy for the last three months. I am not putting up with his crap anymore. If he can't be a nice to me I don't want any part of it.
I'm disgusted. After this, and thinking more clearly (THANKS TO THERAPY) I want him out of my life. He makes me want to puke.
Thank You!! I just wanted you to know how much you have helped me. Is it weird that I always look forward to your advice because it seems like you know my situation so well? lol
Anyways, I just want you to know how appreciated you are!
xoxoxo
CB-
It makes my day to know that I have helped someone here. I'm glad that you are open to receive the truth of the situation. You just need to learn to love yourself more and know your worth and know your boundaries, limits, and deal-breakers.
I have learned all of this the oh-so-hard way. I look back now at things I tolerated that I would never tolerate now. That's the place I want to see you at. You will get there. You are already making strides. :-)
Hugs, GF
LOL....what a fucking dumbass! I hate any guy that asks for naked pics of me,it pisses me off......and i certainly don't want a pic of your stupid penis! If you notice,nice,respectful,classy guys don't ask for naked pics and don't send pics of their dicks...just sayin....
Thanks for believing in me even though I keep failing with letting him back in my life. Thank you for not judging me and being such a great support system. I love you all from the bottom of my heart!!! xxA
I don't know your narc but I think I hate him. What a stinking pig! These guys are so disgusting :( I am so sorry. Just get away from him. Never, ever look back, ok? No human being deserves to be treated with such crassness or disrespect. Take GOOD care of yourself, ok? You deserve princess treatment!
Before I went NC and he was seeing the OW but didn't know I had discovered this he asked me to send him pictures of my"boobs" so he'd have something to jerk off to. I told him you really must think I have no respect for myself. Also reminded him he had from the beginning told me I needed a breast reduction. Also told him he seemed to enjoy doggy style the most since he didn't have to see my breast. Wouldn't it be nice if we could force feed them their balls. Sorry little angry too.
Good for you, Cherryblossom! You are getting stronger every day! I'm so glad you're not giving in to his demands. You're right, you are way too good for him!!!!! xoxo
It would not have been possible if not for this site and all the support I get from people that actually understand what its like being with these type of men. I hope you know how awesome you are for helping us. xxA
Wouldn't it be nice if we could force feed them their balls. Sorry little angry too. that is not possible!!!! they havent got any balls.... i have more balls than both my narcs could ever have...lol, and they both told me this as well.... i was their "BALLS".... fought their battles protected them front real life.... oh bless, hope they have both met "gladiators" to protect them...now their "little ball breaker"{me!} has left them...poor babes....
So weird!! In your experience did you ever notice that they are kind of cowards? I always had the feeling that my narc was afraid of me. That's why he would always threaten me that if I acted out of line or said anything bad to him he would never see me again.
It's funny though because they can say the most awful things to us but they can't handle even the slightest ridicule. In my case, wasn't even allowed to stick up for myself or he would RAGE. Yes, these men have no balls. They are complete babies. SO SO glad you got away from them!!
I remember after the OW was revealed, my friend on the East Coast said, "What a coward" when I caught the ex-Psych professor in the lie and he whined "You put me in an awkward position."
When I had the ex-P for freshman lab, he'd say, during class discussions "You're scaring me" if I showed emotion. And I was the one who had lost my beloved grandfather to cancer. He'd say that I scared him... and I always wondered why. I was nothing but kind, compassionate to him. What had I done to him?
"He would always threaten me or said anything bad to him he would never see me again"-Early on the ex-P said that if I said ANYTHING about him behind his back-be it praise or insult-he'd abandon me. He once said "I'll cut you loose. I've cut lots of people loose."
"They can say the most awful things to us but can't handle the slightest ridicule"- The ex-P would insult me backhandedly to my face, but say WORSE things behind my back. He'd ridicule me behind my back. I called him out on it... saying "if you're mocking me, why can't I mock you?" The ex-Psychopath professor would say he didn't mock himself because he TOOK HIMSELF SERIOUSLY,and that he was afraid of people mocking him behind his back. It scared him in a profoundly visceral way. When he said he wouldn't mock himself, I said I'd mock him and do the job for him. He glared.
He'd insult me horribly, tell his male disciples that he wished I'd drop dead... and yet feared ridicule.
When I've broken NC... it's been to flaunt my happiness and RIDICULE him. I know he hates it (he doesn't contact me, hasn't in a decade) If he knew how his philosophical essays were being ridiculed here and on another website,he'd curl up and die.
Speaking of babies... I DID compare the ex-P to a baby in a note I sent him, since my brother in-law and his father have THE SAME NAME. I am now an aunt. I used the happy occasion of my nephew's birth (whose b-day is an exact month after the ex-P's) to mock the ex-P as a baby.
My nephew now has 5 teeth. The ex-P was always chewing on pencils. Should I send the ex-P one of those teething toys, and chalk it up to honest confusion, since their fathers' names are the same?
After what the ex-P did to me, he'd be as free to enter my mind as one could cross Checkpoint Charlie back in the day, or crossing the DMZ into North Korea.
I used to protect him. I fought his battles.
I wonder how he'd feel to see entire passages of his lecture quoted for the sake of ridicule. At another website, I've used the ACTUAL titles of his lectures as comic fodder.
Yeah, I wonder how he'd feel. Poor baby.
Before I went NC and he was seeing the OW but didn't know I had discovered this he asked me to send him pictures of my"boobs" so he'd have something to jerk off to. I told him you really must think I have no respect for myself. Also reminded him he had from the beginning told me I needed a breast reduction. Also told him he seemed to enjoy doggy style the most since he didn't have to see my breast. Wouldn't it be nice if we could force feed them their balls. Sorry little angry too.
You should take a photo of a big penis from the internet and send it to him! YES and say if this had been you ...i would have fought harder to keep you around.... but i dont do button "mushrooms"
OMG!! You guys crack me up. Almost fell off my bed laughing so hard. Could you imagine his response?!! He would go crazy. lol Can I borrow both of your balls so I can actually do it?? Pretty please? lololololo's
Slob. I was here, too, kiddo. When he wouldn't talk to me a year ago, I texted him a pic and that got him to come back. Who's the bigger loser? Then, it was a draw.
Today, HE IS. Ignore that ignoramus. What a slob and just honestly stupid as dirt to not appreciate what a beautiful, amazing woman you are. He is an animal. I am so sorry you went through this but it helps us all to see that they are just foul animals. I mean, my freaking BUNNY has a bigger heart than my xN does!
A feaking fly has more heart than our psychopaths do. lol
I have kept up with your blogs and I pray for strength for you everyday. Hope you are doing better, my dear.
You only deserve the best!!! I just hope you know it now!! xxA
don't do it! i fell for that too, and he ended up sending it to someone, tried to tell me i said it was OK (it wasn't and i didn't!). the more i do, the more ultimatums he comes up with - odd perversions. when i recently asked why the ultimatum, he said i was paranoid.
if you give him one thing, he'll think of what else he can demand! you fall for it because you're decent and expect decency and they're sick.
I won't do it. Not any more. And that's why he is trying to use this power play on me.
What kind of a person does this? The man I loved is long gone. I can't keep falling for his new tactics.
I went no contact for over a month and then he came back so very sweet and kind. The worst thing is I fell for it!!! I really thought he had changed. Now these threats in a matter of one day.
Now he doesn't get pictures or to see me. HIS LOSS!!!
I am just sick with myself. There is a reason for the NC RULE!! To save our selves from our selves and to stop the pain. So angry at myself right now!!! I knew better!!
you said you had 4 weeks NC then he came back and was sweet and you thought he might has changed.
Ok you just have fallen into the emotional torture trap.
The thing is, we go NC, maybe longer than any time before, my longest was 8 weeks. For me it was like hell, I was better with each passing day but for me it was like years and decades have passed by. It is because we experience this time as pretty emotional and dramatic and its a big paradigm shift for us.
Thats why we think, they have changed after what? 4 or 8 weeks or even 6 months.
I thought that too, but it is so redicioulus to think they changed first and second after such a short perioud of time.
Cherryblossom, you know I am/was in the same situation, infact HE is now in NC with me, cause I refused to send him any pics at all. And even if I'd send one he wouldnt change, or see me or suddenly love me...please you know its just insane. Please just go NC, start new and never look back!!!
ewa
Q: "How can he be so sweet
Girlfriday... Thank You.
Keep up the good work,
Girlfriday Rocks!!
CB- It makes my day to know
LOL....what a fucking
Thanks Friends!!
Narc Pig
cherryblossom
Force Fed Balls!!
Good for you!
Thanks Lisa!!
Wouldn't it be nice if we
USED...
YES, they are COWARDS!!!
Kick ass post, used!
When their gladiators become their attackers
cherryblossom
cherryblossom
helldweller
hahahahaha
Great idea...
lol
helldweller
pics
Helldweller...
naked texts
Thanks Marissa!!!
cherryblossom