Hypnosis

14 posts / 0 new
Last post
#1 Sep 24 - 7PM
into the light
into the light's picture

Hypnosis

Recently found out my ex N had signed up to a hypnosis /neuro-linguistic programming site, saying he had been studying 'conversational hypnosis' with mixed results and wanted to learn from those with more knowledge. Anyone else discovered anything like this? Makes me even more sure that they are completely aware of what they do. Predators.

Sep 24 - 9PM
Pride and Shame
Pride and Shame's picture

Getting into my Head

The fixed unsmiling stare I will always remember. In the beginning I used to think he was undressing me in his mind, now I think it was completely predatory. He also would ask me certain questions as if to gauge how embedded he was in my thoughts. Really early on, like in the first few days, he asked me if I dreamed about him. I always thought that was strange. Creepy that your X is taking that class.
Sep 24 - 9PM
dulcinea441
dulcinea441's picture

Narcs are natural hypnotists.

Narcs are natural hypnotists. And it does make me think they are aware of their desire to manipulate because they know exactly how to take control of people's minds. I want to forgive my N by believing he knows not what he does, but when I think back to some of these scarier attempts at mind control, I ain't so sure anymore...
Sep 24 - 8PM
Elena
Elena's picture

Predators

Of course, that makes sense. At some level, yes they are aware of what they are doing. I think that the reason why they continue to do it and don't feel bad about it is because their conscience is disensitized/seared. Definitely a "predatory" personality.
Sep 24 - 7PM
dulcinea441
dulcinea441's picture

That just gives me the

That just gives me the chills. sounds like he wants to learn new and improved ways to suck the souls out of his victims.
Sep 24 - 8PM (Reply to #2)
into the light
into the light's picture

Yes, and I worry of course

Yes, and I worry of course that he was practising on me. He used to stare at me so hard and fixedly at times, I had to look away. But he did say towards the end of the relationship, after he had taken up with his new woman, that one thing wrong with the relationship was that he couldn't 'programme me'. His eyes are scary: they changed from being bulging and fish-like (not a good look during sex when he was on top, staring hard into my eyes like the psycho I now know he is)to cold and emotionless, even when his mouth is smiling. I see that so clearly in photos now.
Sep 24 - 9PM (Reply to #10)
dulcinea441
dulcinea441's picture

Yes, my narc would sometimes

Yes, my narc would sometimes stop and just stare at me fixedly, as though he were trying to mesmerize me. I think that's what he was attempting to do, actually. "Programming" Yikes. How creepy.
Sep 24 - 9PM (Reply to #3)
CaminoReal
CaminoReal's picture

NLP

I am convinced that my narc used neurolinguistic programming, conversational hypnosis and embedded messages...especially in the beginning. He would have certain rituals b4 and after our "lovemaking", he insisted that I look into his eyes during certain activities. Look up embedded messages and the above mentioned hypnosis strategies. You will be amazed. I have signed up to one of the NLP websites to learn more about it and eventually want to tell them how they are teaching sickos to further destroy people's lives. They not only KNOW what they are doing, but they PLAN and PREPARE for the delivery of the hypnosis. Another way to gain control over us. What else do they have, right? They are dark, empty vessels. This is one reason we feel SO ATTACHED and so attracted to them. Brainwashed! I know it sounds ridiculous, but.... Anybody else out there feel the same way?
Sep 25 - 6AM (Reply to #9)
into the light
into the light's picture

NLP sites - Thanks Camino, I

NLP sites - Thanks Camino, I just googled some of those on youtube - my God, they are giving these evil psychos lessons in how to improve their techniques! I'm hoping I wasn't very suggestible. I would feel uncomfortable with the gaze / stare and look away or even move away - he didn't like that. I often used to reject his compliments because I'm well aware of my faults. I wish I'd been more alert to his behaviour though - I'm sure some things got through to my unconscious mind which explains (along with the release of oxytocin) why I can't get him out of my mind and rid myself of my cravings for him, even when I know he is an empty, sick scumbag who doesn't deserve to share the same air as normal people.
Sep 24 - 9PM (Reply to #8)
Sunafterrain
Sunafterrain's picture

Camino

You are right on. I've said this over and over and over again, and you've just said it too. YES THEY KNOW WHAT THEY ARE DOING! YES THEY DO IT ON PURPOSE! YES, THEY DO IT TO HARM YOU AND THEY GET OFF ON IT! Yep. I felt creeped out when my ex would stare at me. It was the MOST uncomfortable feeling.
Sep 24 - 9PM (Reply to #5)
Caligirl
Caligirl's picture

NLP, yep, bingo!

I just finished reading "Women Who Love Psychopaths" by Sandra Brown. She talks about this in her book, and it hit home. I think my exN may have used this on me. He is the master of words, writes music, and can talk himself out of anything fast. He would also stare deep into my eyes and say something, some times a line or text over and over same lines. In the beginning he'd have us sit on the bed, and I'd have to put my hands on his, and synchronize our breathing. He had a few sayings he repeated over and over to me, like "You're my world." Brown says this makes things sink in as if you're hypnotized, strengthening the attraction and bond b/t you. That is why often hypnosis is successful in many victim's healing. It really does give one the chills. Truly evil.
Sep 24 - 10PM (Reply to #6)
Sunafterrain
Sunafterrain's picture

cali

So glad to hear that you read the book! It was fab and I read it over and over when I feel doubt, which has happened a lot lately! Excellent point about hypnosis for therapeutic purposes as well. Psychopaths use the same, although you're right, it's for evil.
Sep 24 - 10PM (Reply to #7)
Caligirl
Caligirl's picture

Sunafterrain, thanks, me too! Brown's book

makes an excellent reference tool, and it does validate one's experience. I think mine was/is a N-P. I wish I knew for sure if he purposely used NLP, bc then it would help in my healing (I'd be so over him!) Mine really was a scary guy, martial arts, scores of weapons, says he knows how to kill people and demonstrates, hides weapons in his house!
Sep 24 - 9PM (Reply to #4)
dulcinea441
dulcinea441's picture

Yep, I took the staring and

Yep, I took the staring and instructions to look deeply into his eyes as a sign of love. Now I realize that he was trying to take control of my psyche. The memory of those eyes burning into me terrifies me.