I broke NC & he has thrown me for a loop

Mine told me I was his exception that he would never get emotionally involved with a married woman but I am exception because of our past. Last week he told me he was getting married after not speaking to me for 5 months. Im thinkin Im not too much of an exception. So No there are no exceptions there just arent.

Do not believe him. I don't know how old you are but if you don't want to waste the next 25 or 30 years of your life keep moving forward and don't look back. This dance can go on forever but in the end you will be so used and abused you will not know which way is up. He is a liar. there are no special one's. And who want to be special in his deviant and pathetic world anyway? Don't you think that you deserve better? I do! peace!

Actions over words. Actions over words.

Oh how sweet, What a great guy! Not. Please.... He will suck you in AGAIN, chew you up and spit you out! Dude you know better! If you see him what do you think will happen? Idealk

"You're a very special woman." "You're the only person who understands me and accepts me the way I am." "Words cannot express the person I think you are." ("But, I'm going to give you the silent treatment, treat you like my whore and use you to meet my needs.") Even if he means the words he says, who cares? He wants validation that (even though) you know his disgusting faults and habits, that you're still into him. And, he knows what an awesome, amazing, beautiful, trustworthy person you are and that he can trust you with his dirty little secret. This false intimacy is his way of securing your trust, that you won't expose him to the world!! F*ck that! I'm not a man-hater, but these Narcs aren't men. Please protect yourself. Please stay away beamoflight.

SORRY, He is just playing games with you and toying with you like a cat does with a mouse,it is hard work to get over these destructive men, I wish you all the best, but you are not HIS exception, we all thought that, it is wishful thinking on your part, you are no different than any other woman he has dated. I thought I could be different for him, after his 4 unsuccessful relationships before me, it is a form of narcissistic thinking in and of itself, I remember reading that comment in a book,

This is a game for them. When we go NC they up the ante, basically they say whatever they need to in order to lure you back in. They cannot stand to lose supply. My X came back a few weeks ago after 9 months is jail for another couple of rounds. He told me I was his soulmate, love of his life, the only one who "gets him", so sorry he hurt me so bad, he even paid me back some of my money. Fast forward only 6 short weeks, as soon as I started to talk with him and give him the attention he craves. He: shorted me the money he promised each week, never showed up when he said he would, insulted me and my home, lied to me, was seeing OW, ect... He just wants to get you back so he can cheat on you somemore. Watch the actions, do not listen to the words, they are only words, they hold no weight at all for a Narc aside from their manipulative value. The tell us all that we are the only one who understands them, the one they are closest to, the best, and it goes on and on. Watch what he does. Friends have no idea what they are really like. You know. You know, listen to your instincts, you know he is full of crap. Don't set yourself up for more pain, you deserve sooooo..... much better. God bless, Goldie

I don't know your situation very well, but my first instinct when I read your topic post was that he said what he said to manipulate you and lure you back into caring about him after your no contact suggested otherwise. I can picture you as a gentle trusting fish approaching a big shark who is smiling inside because you are putting yourself within his reach again. So to keep you there he is telling you that you are special to him, you are the only one who he trusts... only you. All the while his cold shark eyes are beaming with excitement that he'll be able to chew you up and spit you out if he decides that is what he wants to do, he just needs you to let your guard down and trust him again. Before I knew my ex was a narc I emailed to him one time asking how he was and letting him know I cared etc. Not in a needy way, just as a matter of fact. His reply to me was to thank me and say "you are one of the good ones". WTF does that really mean? Most of the women he's been involved with have been completely removed from his life, but there are a few of us that are 'the exception' and are privileged to be "one of the good ones". Wow, does that make me feel special... Beam of Light, mine would also tell me I am the only one he trusts, but I'm sure he might say the same thing to one of the other 'good ones' if there was a reason to pull them close again and they would feel like the exception too. Point is, he can't be trusted to ever be telling me the truth because people with disorders lie about anything in order to get what they need from us. Your BFF's just don't get it because it is hard from the outside to get. They mean well but don't understand, so what they think about him can't be taken too seriously or else doubt in your reality will grow. Trust yourself and what you know about him. Oh, and 'disappearing' is not what normal people do, but it is what narcs always do. You may very well be 'the exception', but it doesn't mean anything when dealing with a narc except that there is still something you have that he may or may not want again one day and he needs to keep you 'hooked' in order to know he has that control and power. Journey on...

You think this narcissism is a challenge...you don't want to mess with a sex addict. You know the deal. Waking up to aids could be the souveneir left behind... And in all his narcissism after you've been handed the death sentence, he'll project and blame you letting you know it was all YOUR fault cause he told you. You have two ears...Maya Angelou said it best: People will tell you who they are...listen. Aids, not a pleasant way to die. Wake up dismiss the cd, and don't talk to your friends about this...I am sorry to be blunt but they are obviously misinformed in a very big way...and this is not "news" here...this is not a "NORMAL" man, this is a disordered man, and friends although well intentioned, don't have all the background info all we as victims have. Talk shopping, movies, nail polish with your friends...the recovery part...you bring it here or to a therapist. Once you are healed, you can go back to bonding. Right now, you need to be around people in the know when it comes to THIS subject. The recovery rate for Sex Addicts...a whopping close to nil. Please shake this thought. Hugs

I want contact too and when i last broke contact he was sweet and said he missed me and then disappeared and no word since. Even if we are the exception (I believe I am to some extent because I am his only long term relationship and i do think he was comfortable showing me both sides. masked and unmasked). The real question is, even if they do care for us, do we want to be a part of this miserable life style, never knowing when they might run away again or stop speaking?? It is heart breaking to love these men, but they are just too freaking crazy!!! I feel I would have a nervous breakdown or worse if I ever get pulled back in to this madness and these cycles again. I hate being single and without him, but the truth is, I never really had him. He was never reliable, always let me down but was so FUN when he felt like it that I just loved being with him - its the intermittent reinforcement that conditions us to think it might be love and then just drive us crazy with withholding it... My ex N is very sad and guilty about what he did to me, I could hear it in his voice. But he lacks the character to apologize or do anything to heal us. Take some comfort in knowing he connected with you in a way that was special to him, but do not trust what he has in store for you - the are f__K ups, they can't help it, this is what they do. Only a rare insightful N will ever recover if they go to therapy. Most have egos way too big to ever admit to a problem. So they make big problems for us to recover from. I think in time we will wrap our minds around the fact that there is no second chance to fix things - it really sucks - I still love mine and he is off partying somewhere as we speak no doubt.

I'm so sorry you are feeling destroyed..... but there aren't ANY exceptions for them. He wants you to think you are to real you back in. Your BFF's are well intentioned I'm sure, but they don't understand. Don't buy his line of BS! Hugs for you ~K