When I first joined this forum, I was completely lost. I knew nothing about narcissism. A lady by the named of Barbara always responded to my postings (as well as everyone elses). She had so much knowledge & information to share. She didn't always tell me what I wanted to hear & she sometimes was pretty stern with me. But with her guidance, continuous advice of keeping "no contact", & tough love, I can honestly say I wouldn't be where I am today. I can still hear her say,
"They are not human", "Get a tougher lawyer", "Get a counselor that gets it about Ns/Ps", "Absolute no contact".
Barbara didn't read or write a book about N/P's, she & Narcnarc LIVED IT! For them, I am truly thankful that they shared their experience & advice with all of us. It saddens me that you new ladies will not get the opportunity to know these two wonderful ladies & share with them your stories cos you would have learned more than you could have ever learned from anyone else on this board.
I have seen some pretty nasty and slanderous things posted here about Barbara... and they remain. Anything bad about the board owner, however, disappears almost immediately. Anyone who has anything bad to say about Barbara or NarcNarc seems to have the board owner's ear; even if it is not true.
Lisa forget's she said this about NarcNarc:
Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:45 â€” Lisa E. Scott
I find your posts extremely negative and triggering. You are very fatalistic in everything you say. Why are you here if you don't want to get well? It sounds to me like you have given up. I hope that's not the case, but if that's where you're at right now, please don't bring everyone else on the board down into your negative way of thinking.
We're trying to improve our lives and make things happen for ourselves. I am NOT dead yet and I refuse to give up on my life. You speak as if yours is already over. I'm sorry, but that's a choice you're making for yourself and you have no right to tell others who are trying to take control of their life that they're nuts.
As I asked yesterday, if something someone says doesn't resonate with you, simply avoid commenting on it. You do not need to criticize it relentlessly. It may not work for you, but that doesn't mean it might not help someone else."
Does Lisa have any clue what NarcNarc has been through? the beatings? That's she's severely disabled with bad PTSD? That's no choice! That's this poor woman's reality! But Lisa can't handle it so she just banned her.
No where online have I seen Barbara say a BAD WORD about this board, its owner or anyone else. It's all heresay from you guys and Lisa. Probably because Barbara's got ethics. And 2 psychologists who were members here were accused of not being PhDs and made fun of. Another 2 people with ethics that were literally bullied off this board. This is no longer a place of healing - but a place to feed another person's denial and gossip.
You are all dead wrong about Barbara being harsh. This is the internet and you completely misinterpreted and added intentions where there were none. Barbara is deeply concerned and passionate about helping victims and this has been lost in your translations.
I would not be free from my N/P if these two ladies had not given me the tools. Through the persistent nudge from Barbara, I went and hired a tougher lawyer & my exN/P signed his rights over, my dd has a good counselor -- because of Barbara... Thanks to GOD: Barbara, Narcnarc & all the wonderful ladies that cared enough to give advice... I am
truly saved and so is my child & I GET IT NOW.
My advice to you is... Go somewhere where people will be REAL with you. Stop hoping for the impossible! Stop wasting your life! It's not going to happen...