Let's be Friends

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#1 Apr 20 - 4PM
Hunter
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Let's be Friends

Ok Guys, Let's take a count.

How many of you we're told during the D & D "Let's be Friends"??

Idealk

Apr 22 - 2PM
prettypeeved
prettypeeved's picture

Nah, it was long before the

Nah, it was long before the D&D. It was "we'll always be friends, no matter what happens." At the time it was sweet, even adorable. Now it has a distinctly creepy ring, as in "even when you don't want to be friends any more, I'm still going to keep trying...and trying...and trying..."
Apr 22 - 4AM
Alisa
Alisa's picture

Me! After the first D&D I

Me! After the first D&D I really wanted it too. We had done so many fun activities together (even before being a couple), I truly missed that. He said "Let's be friends" but then gave me the silent treatment for a few weeks, followed by really strange conflicting emails. About 2 months later I turned to him because I was going through a rough time. That's when he told me we could be loose friends but not more and that he had a girlfriend. That was the last time I cried because of him. Another 4 months later suddenly he wanted to be friends - close friends! That was when his gf had dumped him (being dumped hasn't happened to him often, usually he's the one who ends things). I just didn't make sense because he was behaving like he wanted to be more than friends. Well, as soon as a new girl was in the picture, he started canceling plans he had made with me and I realized he had just used me to boost his ego and dry his tears. He had never wanted a friendship to begin with and finally I am able to see it and move on...
Apr 22 - 2AM
Journey
Journey's picture

Huh!

Mine has said several times "I'll always be your friend" In truth he doesn't know what that means or how to do it.

Journey on...

Apr 22 - 12AM
broken23
broken23's picture

nope. all i got was "i never

nope. all i got was "i never cared about you"...after 12 years. nice huh
Apr 22 - 12AM (Reply to #40)
Lisa E. Scott
Lisa E. Scott's picture

broken

They are heartless. You are so much better off without that horrible man in your life. He has no soul. xoxo
Apr 21 - 9AM
Happy1
Happy1's picture

Sounds like a big bunch of

Sounds like a big bunch of assclowns to me! Why are we here again? They're the sick minded using pieces of shit
Apr 21 - 9AM (Reply to #37)
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Happy

Ah... I see you are feeling better & shall I say ... Happy! Good Luck Today Make it Ideal Idealk
Apr 21 - 6PM (Reply to #38)
Happy1
Happy1's picture

Hunter

You too will feel better. You got the closure you so wanted. He won't bring you down!
Apr 21 - 6AM
Alibi_10
Alibi_10's picture

Friend? Still a Narc

Oh yes ... count me in for this one. Downgraded to friend ...but still abused. He even complained that i was walking too close to him on the pavement ! I stuck it for so long because i stupidly thought he would realise that i cared for him, but he sabotaged things every single time we met, He controlled all communication, He said what we ate, where we went etc. And i have mentiined before how he would flaunt his body because he knew it would make me want him, and he felt good knowing I couldnt have it. He would tell me all about girls he fancied and said when he met the right person for him, his heart would do somersaults and i did not have that effect on him. Is this how friends treat each other?! The times he screamed down the phone at me to go away ... but then called to apologise, but then blame me for the way he reacted?! He was clever, saying that he was helping me sort my life out .... but he was destroying me ... and the scars are still deep. With friends like this, who needs enemies?! Nope ... their behaviour is the same whatever label you wear x
Apr 21 - 4AM
jen79
jen79's picture

friends

I got this...lets take time...and then...I want to see your boobs... What comes out of their mouth is always babble babble babble.
Apr 21 - 9AM (Reply to #34)
Arwen
Arwen's picture

Jen LOL.

Jen LOL.
Apr 20 - 10PM
Arwen
Arwen's picture

UGGGHHH YES! I got, "We need

UGGGHHH YES! I got, "We need to be FRIENDS...we need to take some time apart!!!" Screamed at me of course.
Apr 20 - 6PM
Happy1
Happy1's picture

He didn't even say that to

He didn't even say that to me. He's just a jerk!
Apr 20 - 7PM (Reply to #29)
sara-smile
sara-smile's picture

Happy

Mine neither! Mine said, "we can still have sex....right?" Bastard!
Apr 20 - 7PM (Reply to #31)
Finally Faced It
Finally Faced It's picture

laughable.

yeah..sure...right, jackass. Seriously. If you take a step back and really look at it, these guys are laughable. Truly. It's like a child getting in trouble and having a privilege taken away...and all they can say is, "But I still get dessert after dinner, right?"
Apr 20 - 7PM (Reply to #30)
Happy1
Happy1's picture

Yes! That's what mine wanted

Yes! That's what mine wanted in the end. Just sex and I'm not a hooker! sicko's
Apr 20 - 5PM
rainbow1
rainbow1's picture

MINE!

He just told me two days ago that "I am a great friend, but anytime we try to be anything more all we do is fight". But he doesnt want to be out of my life and said he will always "be here" for me.

_______________________________________________
"dont let yesterday take up too much of today"

Apr 21 - 7PM (Reply to #27)
Timehelps2
Timehelps2's picture

Sounds familiar

Until I texted him when I was having a rough night a few days after we decide to "take a break" and he totally blew me off. This is after telling me a million times how he'd always be there for me and this break would change nothing between us and he was just going to wait for me until things settled down for me. Ummmm... he was on a a date because he was finally "truely free" to move on even though he had been with her for months before lying about it to me. Some friend.
Apr 20 - 9PM (Reply to #26)
Smitten Kitten (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Mine said the same thing,

Mine said the same thing, especially regarding Facebook. "We're better friends away from Facebook." He loved blaming FB for why we fought, but that's like blaming the phone for the crappy things he said to me. I told him it's not FB, it's YOU! We started fighting because he was always accumulating new "women friends" (supply) and flirting with them or just letting them be suggestive on his page, just to gain attention from all of them and make me jealous. I reminded him, we are not friends, we are lovers. Not that we weren't both, but he tried to compartmentalize them. Now I know he was D & D'ing me in so many small ways that just kept escalating until the big bomb he dropped on me at the "end." But wait! There's more! Even THAT wasn't the end. The thing is, I wrote him a letter a couple of months before the big D & D, about how I felt he was stringing me along and trying to move me to "friend status" while he was looking for a replacement, which of course he denied. I looked back at that letter and it played out exactly as I thought it would. I re-sent that letter to him after the big D & D , pointing out how he did EXACTLY as I predicted in the letter. No response. But the reality is, I felt him trying to move me to "friend" status vs. "lover" status a few months before he actually did it (except of course when he was screwing me through this process.) Sorry, asshole, you don't get to make that call! I am not an object you get to change from "lover, my everything" to "friend" 3 weeks later. Bite me!
Apr 20 - 5PM
mystwoman
mystwoman's picture

Xnh said it to me a bunch of

Xnh said it to me a bunch of times (meaning he won't really be a friend to me, but he still would like to suck off me for NS at his convenience). He also said, "I don't want to part enemies" and "I have done a lot of thinking and I can NOT tell you I don't love you" (his exact words copied from an old email). Too late about the enemies part. That happened when he told me he wished I'd go ahead and die, and when he said maybe he'll beat the sh*t out of me until I divorce him. His cheating on me didn't particularly inspire me to want have him as one of my friends either. With "friends" like xnh, who needs enemas (oops, I mean enemies). As for xnh saying, "I have done a lot of thinking and I can NOT tell you I don't love you", I wondered whether or not xnh could possibly get any more "double negatives" into one sentence or be any more vague. That sentence seems like a whole lot of verbiage that says...nothing. rofl.

______________________________________________________
God sometimes removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.

Apr 20 - 5PM
kgirl
kgirl's picture

Idealk....oh my gosh you make

Idealk....oh my gosh you make me laugh....thank you for this post :) I know my narc is a girl....but they really are all the same! She really is a fucking NARC!!! ~KG
Apr 20 - 5PM (Reply to #22)
Hunter
Hunter's picture

KG

Told You. Im just trying to make a point! Same person, different body. They are sick, its a disorder. A disorder that cant be fixed. :( Trust me, I wish this was all a dream. Idealk
Apr 20 - 5PM (Reply to #23)
kgirl
kgirl's picture

You made your point

You made your point :) .....and it's a nightmare!
Apr 20 - 5PM
healing NZ
healing NZ's picture

Just the once

Exactly 11 days after he threw me out of HIS house, and while comforting me because my beautiful little dog had just been hit by a car and killed ... I told him I had just lost my best friend - the dog. Then I said that I had lost both my best friends - him and the dog. His exact words in response to that: "you'll only lose my friendship if YOU CHOOSE to" A few days later he accused me of trying to take advantage of my dog dying. WTF?!!! I chose to lose his friendship ... if that is even what it was. Still hurts though.
Apr 20 - 5PM (Reply to #19)
Hunter
Hunter's picture

OMG!!

My Friend's mother died and he accused me of the same. Be careful ladies, You can't even have peace during death with these idiots. Idealk
Apr 20 - 6PM (Reply to #20)
healing NZ
healing NZ's picture

It's all about them.

Even the death of another. I later found out that the night my dog died (he loved her btw) he posted an RIP to her on facebook. No acknowledgement of the dog being mine of course - it was all about him - and apparently he got lots of commiserating comments. ==> supply!!
Apr 20 - 5PM
Smitten Kitten (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

I was!

The bastard said, "You know I'm interested in pursuing a relationship with her, I was hoping we could still be friends." A few weeks later, as I'm still interacting with him on the phone and through texts & emails, and I'm talking about how he "dumped" me, he says: "I didn't DUMP you. When you dump someone, it means you no longer want to have anything to do with them, not remain friends. I just changed the dynamic of the relationship." Talk about fu**ing arrogance! Grrrrr..........
Apr 20 - 5PM (Reply to #17)
healing NZ
healing NZ's picture

Classic!

"... I just changed the dynamic of the relationship." Imagine the average garden-variety N getting their hands on THAT line!!!
Apr 20 - 5PM
ShaynasMommy
ShaynasMommy's picture

"Lets be friends"....oh Jeez,

I heard it too many times to count. Because we broke up and got back together too many times to count. One time it was during what I would have called a "partial" D&D. He said we needed to "work on our friendship before we could get any closer to being serious." The last time, after dumping me at the altar basicallay, he still had the nerve to expect friendship and told me I was selfish and immature for denying him that after so many years together. So, anyways, Yeah. Count me as one.
Apr 20 - 5PM (Reply to #2)
Redhead1
Redhead1's picture

I got that plea too. Even

I got that plea too. Even told me no other woman could come between him and me\kids. I wish someone could could interpret that narc speak for me. I am feeling so mean right now, I'd probably tell him "i don't think its appropriate to be friends with my ex when I am in a new relationship. He and I have boundries" uhhgg I am just in the angry stage, but its funny angry. I can laugh now.