NO LAUGHING MATTER!..NARCS are not a JOKE......

I think that this situation has gone more than just a little out of control. Can we stop attacking Lisa? I would like to say that I saw that video some where around the inception of this site and her book... It has never been hidden, it is to the right of the main frame of the forum..? And I was not offended. It is what helped me to get here? Along with the radios pod-cast’s that framed Narcissism in a less humorous light. Its OK! It’s important to discuss the media schema in all this… Every time you pick up a news paper or watch the news you are buying into an ethos, a framed perspective that has been designed down to the last detail, to indoctrinate and programme with a particular agenda. After all Narcissism is rife in out society. The hidden giants- the corrupt powerful bodies that control the media and censor the information that we see on our televisions or read in papers, purposely, cultivate and dominate the stuff we see to create a ‘power balance’ where we are driven to believe what is said is true, to assimilate the information and then to seek a related action as required of us… and thus assuming our place in the ‘hidden agenda’. This is manipulation for evil means (power, money, status, etc) and that is Narcissism. Sadly, Narcissistic values are part and parcel of the fabric of our society. WGN news would have been told very precisely how they were to frame the piece. To frame the topic of narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder more seriously may have been to give away some control over a topic that actually is an endemic disease that thrives in the heart of American living or indeed in the West in general. Advertising, consumption and power are all part of this same topic. They made light of it and there was laughing but I feel sure that Lisa would not have been able to get that far if she had been pointing out the more sinister side to this very real ‘DIS-ease’ But that said… she still got to share her book with the viewers who in one way or another would have been given the ‘gift’ of some ‘original knowledge’, albeit limited and controlled, but still a door way into a better understanding of this very important topic. I would suggest that many people ignorantly live without thinking or knowing about what ‘Narcissistic behaviours’ are and who or where they manifest from… And clearly this was a good tool for Lisa to use to get her point across to as many possible victims (and possibly even perpetrators) who were watching at the time. I also think the ‘childish’ quiz; which remember was as staged and as the rest of the news to enforce a certain slant, demonstrated perfectly that even the presenters had a sort of ‘latent narcissism’ (perhaps a not a dangerous pathological form of N) but they were laughing awkwardly, protecting themselves in some way, by answering the quiz so disingenuously. Narcissistic personality traits are key traits, in jobs in the media, and to some corporate companies you can’t get ahead without being so… So, I feel for those who have been destroyed by pathological abusers, those who have been stripped of there human rights and delivered into a life of poverty and depression, it’s a tough situation to get out of and recover from. AND its certainly NOT a laughing matter at all… BUT directing your anger and hatred at a person who is plainly only brought this amazing web-site to us, to help us connect and support each other is not going to make the anger and hate go away. Projecting anger at the wrong people will only force a situation into play that is not suitable for anyone. I don’t know about credentials and qualifications. I don’t think Lisa has ever suggested that she was anything more than a writer who has taken steps to enhance her understandings of human behaviours like N to help others. I have many ‘letters’ after my name and have been studying for over 15 years but not one of these ‘letters’ gives me the accreditation to ‘counsel or coach’. I studied a Masters in health and community and social work but it does not give me the qualification to practise as a ‘social worker’ … And yet I work in a support and advice roll with troubled young people and those with disabilities. And aside from my CAB check (that’s a British police check) it was through hard graph and experience alone that I have been able to do this work. I have built a CV which demonstrates my skills and given hours of time voluntarily at first, to have a command of this role that means I am able to advice and support un-biasly, open heartedly in my area of expertise. I would be horrified if someone questioned my intentions when I do this just to help people and certainly not for the money…. Lisa pays for the web site, pays her moderator, albeit not a great deal, but is still never the less the architect and mediator of this site. What she has done has helped countless people to deal with the trauma and ill health of living with Narcissism. And so what if she gets any money at all for her books. Why shouldn’t she??? Writing for living is not easy and it requires hours of dedication, time and energy. First books rarely make much money anyway so let’s just get off this hobby horse. It just sounds like jealousy.. Please lets stop scape-goating Lisa for the ill health and destruction in our lives caused by people who had no intention of helping us or supporting us… People who are deranged, dangerous, pathological evil people who have no intention of helping anyone but themselves, stealing and coveting our energy and life force. Every time a Narcissist takes away someone else’s power and uses it for themselves they are building up a repertoire of pain to unleash on others. It’s a cycle of pain and destruction that burns through cities, towns, states, burning everyone it meets and touches. We could do worse than be here on this site with our brethren and sisterhood, learning how to recognise it, avoid it and also get it out of our lives for good. It would be prudent to gain that kind of awareness so that we can build our own repertoire of knowledge that will help us to protect out selves, protect our children and protect our communities and whole societies from this ‘DIS-ease’… That is Pathological socio-paths/psychopaths, liars, cheaters, thieves, molesters, rapists and killers. Evil scum!!! This site is also about building relationships with our kin and making connections that serve our healing? Is making a example of Lisa going to enhance your healing journey???? Lisa is not at fault here. Why is she being subjected to so much attack and bad will? She is not the Narcissists that took our trust, that manipulated our thoughts.. that demonstratively tricked us before unleashing there ‘true’ evil demonic personalities… AND in what ever form, be that physical-beatings or an obtuse verbal assaults…she is not that is she???? So let’s just stop projecting this on to her. Do we want to make her ill, make her feel bad about herself? What is the outcome of this divisive threatening behaviour? Are we trying to humiliate her, belittle her in front of others? Are we trying to intimidate her and bully her? Make her feel small or stupid? Try to show her up as a fraud? WHY!!!!??? FOR WHAT? What can you really hope to possibly achieve with that stuff??? Not much I should imagine.. I think that is what the damn NARCS did to us!!! Don’t let them maintain there reign of fear, by turning us into bitter people.. Let’s please get hold of the facts and let this go or other wise turn around and leave, find another site for support because plainly this site is not here so that we can abuse the person who brought it to us. That’s just plainly silly.

This was a TV program which was arranged this way. And there were 3 nice guys invited ;). I think sometimes is good to smile a bit, not to be always so serious. Lisa did nothing bad in my opinion.

I cannot say I was "happy" about Lisa's performance, but that is the way media spins. Take a look at the cover of her book and the design of this website...it's comical in design, even though the subject matter is not. Look at it!!!!! Another thing to consider is most people would not even know about these pathologicals if presented all serious dark and gloomy on the particular news clip she was in.Consider the programming. Ladies, I am not saying I like it. But the reality of it is it is all marketing. And the marketing got me to this site. That's the truth of it...insulted, whatever, we all have a right to our opinions. PR sucks...but if it helps one person break free or heal from these awful people, it might be worth it(and I am not talking about SR...not convinced on that one.) I know Barbara works her butt off and I appreciate all she does. And I know it is insulting to all the pain we've been through...but take a look at the bigger picture. Lisa's "presentation"...meaning the outer shell of her work... has never been "serious" if you ask me. But it get's people thinking, to this site, and maybe some help.

This is getting COMPLETELY carried away. Of course what these a-holes due to people is NOT a joke or a laughing matter. Sometimes people make humour out of a crappy situation as a form of therapy or what have you. READ around this board and look at how many jokes are made about the narcs or making silly comments about ourselves for putting up with it etc. Several posts are like this and filled with "lol" and "RMAOL". I am sorry that you you have had such a traumatic experience. I truley am. I am sorry that you can't afford proper therapy, food etc. No human being deserves what you are going through, but I do have to say that that is no excuse to be so incrediabley mean to someone. I think you are very out of line.

Lisa was on a news show for about a 5 min span..u really cant get anyone to understand how serious and detrimental it is to one who has lived and shared an intimate life with a narc. How was she suppose to react when the neewscasters were laughing about it??? Should she have been rude? And told them hey ur not allowed to laugh?? I dont think a 5 min span on a news show would allow anyone to expalin full blown narcs. People that know them dont even understand them...thats y we r here because no one around us understands to the extreme a narc can go! I think Lisa has given us a place to vent,feel safe and understood and to pick up some good advice and for that I thank her!!! hugs to u Lisa

Yeah.."they don't change, so you either decide to accept it or get out". Mmmmmmmm For one thing, they do change. I've seen it right before my very eyes. The loving doting husband changed from just that, to an abusive exploitive downright monster right before the kids and I to get out of HIS house! So his possessiveness, jealousy, and controlling attitude that I thought was there because he loved me........ was nothing but hiding his cheating, lying, and totally strategized leaving us, with nothing but debt...... though he would not allow me to work................ all of us spinning......Who the Hell was that????? I would call that change! Many narcissists are psychopaths, and all pyschopaths are narcissists. Barbara taught us that. You're not just messing with an inflated ego.... You are messing with people that are only using you, do not hesitate to hurt you or your children, cheaters , liars, walking time bombs, that will blow up your life without hesitation or conscience. Yes you. You are not the special one, the one he has been waiting for all his life...as many of us are told. YOu are a victim waiting to happen!. I know. It has happened to me. Never saw it coming.....if only ego were all involved, then maybe we wouldn't be hungry today?

I watched this about a week ago and I, too, was very disurbed by it. I live in Chicago, and the stupid WGN morning news team is annoying enough with watching them belittle what we're going through with the help of our advocate. It seems to me that Lisa, the book, and the promotion are about "narcisssistic" men--you know: self-centered asses. I think what may have happened here is that Lisa's book led to this forum, which ended up being a forum for the much more serious and devastating realities of bona fide antisocial personality disorders. That's from the people that came here, not from Lisa. I know that every time I come on here and see the book cover illustration, it seems lighthearted in the extreme. That said, I'm a writer, too, and have done a lot of t.v. stuff. They put you up there and THEY decide what they want it to be about. I don't know how much Lisa had to do with the tone of this particular piece, but I do remember reading that there have been issues from others with Lisa appearing too flippant or some similar quality about the subject matter. I would suggest to Lisa, if she hasn't already, to consider taking up the cause to fight against the really f-d up stuff these people have done to all of us. They are NOT the guys with the sparkly teeth who wine and dine us while they look in the mirror. When they dump us, we don't eat ice cream and watch chick flicks and get over it. I think what Lisa has done is beyond value. But I think she should think about putting the right face on it.

trying to help us....REALLY counseling us....listening...advising...CARING.....while the OWNER is out LAUGHING ABOUT NARCISSISM..... am i the only person here who sees anything WRONG with this picture?.......and this VIDEO????