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Sometimes I feel like the N

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#1 Jul 15 - 11AM
SusieSwizzle
SusieSwizzle's picture

Sometimes I feel like the N

reason being...my temper flared SO MUCH with him. I mean full out TIRADES of hate and anger, to the point where I said anything to get under his skin. Cruel things! And Im not even a cruel person! Do I have N Traits? I mean - in the end, I found myself wanting to apologize for being insincere and angry and CRAZY....but stopped myself bc I thought of the silent treatments, the ignoring, the cold and unemotional reactions...yet...Im like...I could have just ignored him, too...right?? Have I picked up on his habits..maybe Im like an inverted N? some women say their Ns lashed out, over texted etc etc..that sounded like ME when we fought..IDK..anyone else ever feel like this?

Jul 17 - 3PM
Susan32
Susan32's picture

The reversal

The ex-Psych prof expected me to apologize when I told him I was in love with him, that I cared about him. He acted as if his feelings were hurt. It's one thing if a Narc drives you nuts, makes you angry... and you end up apologizing for a human reaction to their outlandish behavior. And I was apologizing to the ex-P because I told him I liked him? Even my friends were baffled... that's not a natural reaction to being told you're loved. If I had been throwing books&rulers at him... yeah, I would've probably apologized. But apologizing for a declaration of love? REALLY? He'd say "I'm discomfited","I'm embarrassed","I'm offended" and lecture me about appropriate behavior. It's not like I was going off into tirades of anger&hatred. I don't get it.
Jul 17 - 10AM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

SS

Everyone, is a bit of a narc. It depends where you are on the Narc scale. These crazies cause you to behave like a nut, Its part of the process. Its stop when you stop it. If you are aware of your behavior you can correct it. A true Narc is perfect. NCNCNCNCNCNCNC. Hunter
Jul 16 - 7AM
.brokenglass.
.brokenglass.'s picture

What did he make me?

I have wondered this exact same thing. Because I would get so angry, I would yell out of..."Just can't take no more" feelings. I laugh now because I couldn't say hurtful things (except once & I felt terrible, the fact that it hurt me to think I hurt him shows me I'm still good & not a narc), but I would just tell him I miss him & luv him, let me help u and he could look me dead in my big'ol puppy dog eyes & tell me he DOESN't everything I told him, and then have the nerve to say I hurt him and don't I think he has feelings. Bahaha I laugh at u now punk, I'm sure your hurting cause the cops removed u from your home..WE CANNOT BECOME WHAT IS NOT IN OUR HEARTS..may God bless u & erase those thoughts from your mind and continue to strenghten us all! ~brokenglass~
Jul 16 - 7AM
Scoop
Scoop's picture

I wouldnt put too much

I wouldnt put too much thought into why you lost it with him , i screamed the most terrible things at my narc on the final D&D and that was because i was pushed to the limits of human indurance , even Mother Teresa would have lost it with him . xxx
Jul 16 - 3PM (Reply to #3)
aceonelady
aceonelady's picture

yep...Scoop

You are right on the spot...Einstein said for an action comes a reaction...And even Mother Teresa would have lost after a special Narc treat...And yes,even me that was called by the Narc Mother teresa and Jesus,went off the rails sometimes....No Regrets

Aceonelady

Jul 15 - 11PM
Arwen
Arwen's picture

Wow. I had some kind of hate

Wow. I had some kind of hate for someone today, like a small kernel of it, and I have never felt anything like that before in my life and today I realized that he had rubbed off on me and it scared the heck out of me. I imagined with horror who I might become if I were ever with him long term.