Where are all the guidelines?

9 posts / 0 new
Last post
#1 Mar 18 - 12AM
ClusterF
ClusterF's picture

Where are all the guidelines?

Are you all wallowing in the WHY? this board used to be about valuing yourself and getting away from the narcissists instead of trying to understand the why. Why doesn't really matter. They have a ClusterB personality disorder and we need to learn how to spot it, avoid it and seek better relationships.

Mar 18 - 7PM
apple
apple's picture

Wow!!

what?? I thought I was on like step six but now clearly still on step one!!!!!!! DANG IT!!!! =)
Mar 18 - 8PM (Reply to #8)
Lisa E. Scott
Lisa E. Scott's picture

cherryblossom

LOL, just being here is major progress, my friend! You are no longer living in denial, which is the biggest step! It took me 8 years to get to that step!
Mar 18 - 4PM
IncognitoBurrito
IncognitoBurrito's picture

:o)

I think I feel some wallowing coming on!
Mar 18 - 4PM
michele115 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

I think

If you skip the why, you never figure out the how...then you just do it again...because you never figure out the what...
Mar 18 - 9AM
Goldie
Goldie's picture

Understand it

Step 1 – Understand It Understanding the PDI Step 1 in Lisa's recovery program is to Understand it. We need to be mindful on here that everyone is at different stages of recovery and everyone has different levels of awareness regarding PD's. We have new members on here, which is great because the old timers are able to help the new comers to understand this better. There is healing in helping others to understand it. Many have never even heard of Cluster B PD's. Learning about something brand new to you can be a complicated process in the beginning and there are bound to be many questions. As we all know it is human nature to want to know what just happened when you have been hit by a train, so to speak. Also when you say: we need to learn how to spot it, how can you spot something which you did not even know existed until you gain knowledge regarding the disorder itself? I totally agree that we are all about recovery and learning to value ourselves on here. I have seen many topics on here regarding this. I put a topic of the week on which clearly encourages the members to put the focus on themselves. I think the issue is that we have many new members and they are asking questions because they honestly do not understand PD's. When Lisa's next book comes out, the 6 steps to recovery, I believe that you will see much more of a directed focus on each step and each stage that members are going through and this is why she wrote the book because people like yourself, me, and many many others want the focus to be on recovery. Hope this helps. You are totally right, we want to see recovery and understaning it is a huge piece of recovery, especially in the beginning and obvioulsy if people get stuck in that stage they need to move on to the next step, however, as you and I both know, you cannot force anyway to be ready for the next step, this comes in time when they grow weary of analyzing and want their life back. God bless, Goldie
Mar 18 - 8AM
I don t get it ...
I don t get it I just don t's picture

Guidelines?

"Why" does matter,to me it matters. If you have "guidelines" on how to skip the "why" part of the process, please, please post them.
Mar 18 - 6PM (Reply to #3)
Lisa E. Scott
Lisa E. Scott's picture

The Six Steps....Coming Soon!

Yes, I hope to have The Six Steps posted on the site next week and the new book should be out in two weeks! Hopefully, this will help everyone move forward, but don't forget that the first step is "Understand It." Until we understand it, it's hard to move on. xoxo
Mar 18 - 1AM
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

Some not all need to focus on

Some not all need to focus on the why as it will help them understand how they got here. I for one was one of these people. I think in many instances there is something in us that needs addressing and you cant get to that unless you ask alot of Why's? If you do not address the why's I am a firm believer that you will end up back here weeks, months,years or even decades as was in my case. The first time I was with the A-hole years ago, time and patience brought back myself esteem but here I am 15 years later same guy, same thing. Yes he is disorder and you should value yourself no doubt but if you continued to stay and take abuse or if you have these kinds of relationships over and over you definitely need to be asking Why?