Saw him yesterday/BAD IDEA/MESS.
Saw him yesterday/BAD IDEA/MESS.
AS many as you know we were both in a wedding last night...and I should've bailed. But I didn't. and this morning I am paying for it.
He did it. He made a mess! No I didn't have a psycho attack or anything, but he was on his A game with the mind playing. As soon as he saw me he approached me and told me I look really great and he couldn't believe how great my hair looked, and that he was shocked etc. Then he started talking to me as if nothing had happened, telling me about work, his annoying neighbors, then he hugged me and told me he missed me, and said his dog had been really sad and missing me and waiting by the door for me. I took the bait, and reacted, and told him I missed him too, and started paying attention to him (BIG MISTAKE.)
That was half the night, I decided to stay for the dinner after the ceremony as things were going fine (bIG MISTAKE #2), as the night progressed he kept avoiding me more and more--I went to the bathroom and cried. He kept making me weaker and weaker throughout the night, and kept acting meaner, including "we can't hang out." "it'll never be the same, just so you know."
I left shortly after that. I looked at my phone and his mom had texted me (I deleted her, but recognized her number) with "Hi, I've been thinking and praying for you. I hope you are doing well! I know you probably don't want to reply to this message, I understand." (I am sure he told her I have a mental illness.LOL.)
I woke up with major anxiety, waking up several times throughout the night. Dreaming of him. Breaking NC was a terrible idea, and I never want to do it again. He leaves to see his family for the holidays this Thursday and will be there for about 10 days--that will help! I also found out last night that he had been without a phone for a week because it "broke" but I am pretty sure he threw it against the wall/floor during one of his tantrums.
Oh yes and he kept talking throughout the night how he is applying for a new job in other cities, and really wants to move to Seattle as soon as the holidays are over.
How do I get through this day? I am stressed, and have anxiety. I don't really want to go anywhere either..
Hi Ness, day 2!!! How are you
Better than I was yesterday!
Day One - A New Beginning
reclaiming power
THANK YOU! and you are
Yesterday's sting will take
THANK YOU! I agree! He also
Is his Mom a Narc also?
oh and I don't think his mom
Thank you for your kind
NessMIA
I wanted him to ask me to
I truly feel for you
I wish I could delete him
NessMIA
This guy is text book.. His
Watching Thomas videos right
Hey Nessa....I would use your
Thank you! I will write in my
I hate this addiction I have
I can relate to the pain and
I just saw the post :( I wish
ness
I read it, it was not
You get thru the day knowing
That's a great way of looking
Good Riddens!!!
the grief will come ness
nessmia
NC for life is the only