Day 1 NC - got a text | Lisa E. Scott

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#1 Nov 17 - 7AM

RubyWoo

Day 1 NC - got a text

Pretty much 12 hours since he started conversation with me in the street (I live near his work, he saw me and waited for me) And after some conversation he admitted to be seeing/screwing this other girl, I got a text.

"I know I can't say anything to make you understand.I just hope one day you forgive me because I will never feel the same about anybody. I can't help but think I have made the biggest mistake of my life. You are the best woman I have ever met. I can't believe I got so lost"

I'm sooo tempted to text "I hope you die from a painful STD. Enjoy your new pussy"

#2 Nov 21 - 3AM

RubyWoo

-

Ooops double post!

#3 Nov 20 - 7AM

RubyWoo

Thanks Spinning, I do need a

Thanks Spinning, I do need a reality check sometimes. The thing is, I am a human person with feelings and it's so hard for me to turn off what I feel. I think of his face, I think that if one day I start dating someone and I ran into the N I will see sadness in his eyes. It might be real or not, but in a way I know he would feel sad because he knows what he's lost, doesn't he? I'm terribly sad. So so sad that we had such a beautiful connection, such understanding and chemistry. And now he's destroyed it all.

#4 Nov 18 - 2PM

RubyWoo

DAY 2-

Why do I still wish he would call? I still can't believe he has done it, that he has actually been naked moaning and having sex with someone else... the images keep coming to my mind like a bad nightmare. And then I think of his face, his eyes, his arms that were always around me, for 5 years... And I just burst into tears. Someone help me please.

#5 Nov 20 - 6PM (Reply to #30)

nomoredenial

No you didn't

I'm terribly sad. So so sad that we had such a beautiful connection, such understanding and chemistry. This is the hard but necessary part.... you really didn't if you did you wouldn't be here. That was the hard part for me, how could he just go have sex with someone else after almost 15 years.....because he CARED ALOT about himself and what he was getting. Nothing about me nor you. Its all bullshit!

#6 Nov 21 - 3AM (Reply to #31)

RubyWoo

Thanks, I think that's what I

Thanks, I think that's what I need to get through my head. It all seemed so real, but he was just playing along to what I wanted and I felt. How did you manage to finally internalise it? Any tips??

#7 Nov 21 - 8PM (Reply to #32)

nomoredenial

Its time

I still think about moments and wonder..... like when he caught both our sons at each birth and let them lay on his chest over night so I could sleep, was that not real? What was that? I bet that at the bottom of it all, some parts are real or close to it but I realize thats not enough. Thats crumbs and Im not a bird. Im not sure, I think I am still coming to terms, but the more distance I get the easier it is to see and I know I have to let go of all of it or I get sucked back in. I have a sign on my bedroom door that says "I accept and bless this feeling...Breath" it helps. It really is hell, the first day he left I called and told a friend I feel like i want to die. Thats a big price to pay.

#8 Nov 20 - 8AM (Reply to #26)

Used

rubywoo

PLEASE STAY STRONG.... He left you when your father was dying, he left you at a time when you needed him most, and the images you get about the two of them, The images that will not go away, do you think if you reach out to him they will go away then?... THEY WILL NOT, THEY GET WORSE... if you were with him now, in his arms ,in his bed, do you think those images will still not torture you ...They will!!!!!.... He has hurt you so much, and they are so CRUEL, that if you go back to him, he will be fine at first, then he will begin throwing it in your face, about she done this, she done that......and he will enjoy your pain and hurt...

#9 Nov 20 - 6PM (Reply to #27)

RubyWoo

I know, I know I can't go

I know, I know I can't go back to him and I won't. I deserve a man who loves me inmensely, and someone who jumps between some woman's legs two months after he leaves me (after a 5 year relationship living together!) and when I'm soooo upset about my dad DOES NOT love me. I just hope this missing him feeling will go away soon... I feel like he has won, like the other girl has won. Like they are happy together now and I'm the one all alone and miserable, unattractive and fat. And I need to shake that feeling off.

#10 Nov 20 - 6PM (Reply to #28)

faith_

You are not, Ruby. That is

You are not, Ruby. That is Not the truth!! That is a lie. We tell ourselves such lies, at least I do, and it's not enough that he lied to me, now I imagine this perfect-ess w/ him and other girl or whoever else he is talking to. It's hard to see it when you're in that place, but from the outside, let me tell you you're beautiful and deserving and special, and he does not know how to treat you kindly TRULY whatsoever (regardless of 'special' things and connections and everything that you relate to that I felt too--humor, the little things). The other woman is not 'better' and does not have any special powers. She's just in his destructive path. Sending you love, and I know it's hard, but do not imagine these things that just make you feel bad. I know, it's easy to say, but I am telling you, it is not the truth! Just remember that.

#11 Nov 21 - 3AM (Reply to #29)

RubyWoo

Thank you, I'm going to try

Thank you, I'm going to try and internalise this, and try to realise that even if it all felt real and he seemed soooo in love with me, it was just that I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. I hope I can't get past the jealousy I feel towards the OW right now, and the thoughts that she's sexier and thinner than me.

#12 Nov 18 - 3PM (Reply to #25)

spinning

Ruby, please please please give yourself

a reality check... Toss those images out of your brain. Here's what I recall of your "wonderful" partner of five years. When your dad was on his deathbed he wasn't sure if he could be there for you or not. When you needed him the most he was telling you he needed some space and needed to figure things out (read he was banging someone else back then). You were filled with anxiety at his non-committal responses. He left you hanging constantly. When you asked him to help you you got the exact opposite. This new supply that he's got his arms around will be wishing those arms never got within ten miles of her. This is the REALITY. This is the TRUTH. There is nothing "loving" or "caring" or "lasting" with these selfish, self-absorbed, self-centered freaks. They are predators. They prey on people. Good people like you. She doesn't know it but she is already his VICTIM. You are having CD because that is EXACTLY WHAT HE WANTS. PLEASE UNDERSTAND THAT IS WHY HE SENT THE FULL OF SHIT TEXT. HE IS ATTEMPTING TO KEEP YOU IN THE SUPPLY LOOP. Take yourself out of it, Ruby! You don't need it! You are not confused and you are missing NOTHING! Re-read your initial response to the text. IT WAS RIGHT ON...THAT'S WHERE THE REALITY IS. I hope this helps some, dear Ruby. I have thought of you a lot and know what you went through (with the Dad thing...mine was similiar) and I know you have worked hard to feel better about yourself. DON'T LET THIS FREAK DERAIL IT! Love, (determined to never again be) spinning. NO CONTACT IS THE KEY. DELETE DELETE DELETE

spinning

#13 Nov 18 - 4AM

RubyWoo

You are right Faith it would

You are right Faith it would probably be all the same, but at least he would be trying harder. I can't believe this has ended this way, I thought we had something special, I thought he loved me. How do I get rid of the mental images that keep coming? I'm in so much pain, god help me...

#14 Nov 17 - 7PM

faith_

"If he was truly sorry he

"If he was truly sorry he would be right at my doorstep crying and begging like a baby...A text is just lazy." When NC, I had the crying and begging, and waaay later when I answered, he was still the same to me and did the same, just was more bold about it. When I answered his call after that longest NC, he said "I can't believe I did the things I did, when I had something so precious". As if it was a realization. Well, he cut me again after that comment when I interacted w/ him again and let him in. promises, promises

#15 Nov 17 - 9AM

5kdznme

I think

Your response text is appropriate. LOL. Except don't send it. Just let him bask in his own thoughts of idiocy.

#16 Nov 17 - 8AM

Scoop

Ahh poor baby is so lost ,

Ahh poor baby is so lost , strange though not so lost as to find someone else .. what a pile of pants that text was , delete and NC .. x

#17 Nov 17 - 8AM (Reply to #18)

RubyWoo

Yeah my favourite part was

Yeah my favourite part was "to make you understand". To make me understand what, exactly?

#18 Nov 17 - 8AM (Reply to #19)

Used

To make you understand what

To make you understand what an ARSEHOLE HE IS? JUST IN CASE YOU DIDNT KNOW ALREADY..LOL

#19 Nov 17 - 8AM (Reply to #20)

Winter

LOL Used

Yes, a reminder, just in case... Just in case we doubt for a milesecond or starting to forget what a narky they are! Lol

#20 Nov 17 - 8AM

Kiwi2005

That would be hilarious and

That would be hilarious and the perfect response! But you know what you have to do... DELETE & Don't even think about replying! Whats that? Oh yes, DELETE!!! Don't give him another second of your time :)

#21 Nov 17 - 8AM (Reply to #10)

RubyWoo

I know, I'm not replying. He

I know, I'm not replying. He can live with his mistake. I'm still sooo hurt by the thought of him with another woman though... naked, kissing her, touching her... It's unbearable.

#22 Nov 21 - 3AM (Reply to #16)

Jelickuk

When i found out about ow i

When i found out about ow i felt as if my soul died i truly truly believed he loved me and would never leave and would certainly not be with someone else. we were married 14 years When the truth (and much worse stuff later) came out. I couldn't work, couldn't function. Would sit under a blanket on the sofa. I couldn't even move sometimes and would either be mute with shock or literally howling with pain. i prayed and prayed even though i didn't believe in god. i will never ever forget that place. it is worse than hell. i never ever want to feel that way again. All i can tell you is that i don't feel that way now. i still hurt, still get confused, still have doubts, still get angry and bitter, still doubt myself and obsess etc etc but that terrible wordless place that i think you are in now has passed hold on. don't let him hurt you again use us as your shields stay safe and be so gentle with yourself. you have been terribly wounded. tend to your wounds with kindness and understanding you aren't alone

#23 Nov 17 - 10AM (Reply to #12)

blueworld

RUBY

i am a little over a month no contact and these texts are from the past taken from my online journal but i want you to read them...these are texts from one of the many fights we had please READ I don't want to bug you. I just want to say, whether you believe me or not, i never cheated on you. I'm sorry if i ever neglected you, made you feel unloved, hated, or not special. Truth is i have a way of pushing everyone away that i love. and i DO love you. I know this by my inability to eat or sleep. I have to force myself into these things. I'm not asking to take me back because we have too much pain between us to ever fix. But we also had an incredible amount of love. I know this by my inability to think of anyone or anything but you. I wish we could go back to the very begining and just be happy together , but thats too late now and all i can do is sit here and pine over losing you. that girl dalene got a serious reality check. she's exactly like tim. bases her entire world off of facebook. i didnt go on facebook to talk to anyone, but you have no trust of me to believe me. baby, you were and always will be THE MOST important person in my life. I wish only happiness once again, i'm not trying to upset you at all. I just want to know your alright. I really hope your safe.. i always wanted you to just be happy. I'm guessing your happier wherever you are now. I hate knowing i've made you cry. I hate making you feel bad. I just want you to feel loved and lately i havent been focused on you and it was my fault. I kept putting more stress on our relationship than it could ever handle. So, i really hope you are comfortable and secure. I truly wish there was no drama in our companionship, but i caused so much and you had to handle so much. We were perfect for each other. Only if i never lied to you, and i had just embraced being together more . I love you. and i just cant stops loving you.g i never talke to anyt one olse but our friends. i was changingo into a great man. takin ou placet@ picing things up for you that i knew you.d like or need....i tried giving you space after you thinking i was cheating on you. i wanted you to see the truth. LADIES WHEN I DIDNT RESPOND TO THOSE I GET THIS ACCIDENTLE TEXT~~~~~~~~~ Seriously dude. I cannot just stop thinking about her. Yeah, exercise works for all of 20 minutes, but i'm on the strip right now, with no clue why. I don't want to hook up or even flirt. I'm sure i creep everyone out, since i wear my emotions out on my sleeves. if she was here, i'd be having a great time. watched the fountains, checked out city center, saw a heard of elvis's . But it's nothing without someone to share it with. Damnit! Why did she do this to me? Seriously! I hate this feeling. I did nothing wrong and we're no longer. I know she's still in vegas, because i can still feel her . I love her more than my heart could ever bear. She hates me for to her with love and empathy and took the # #1 memory from her and told her it was a lie. I wanted her to know the truth, but i guess i should have taken it to my grave. She deserves the best, i don't know what i am. i never cheated. I'm glad ofthat. AND THEN LADIES AFTER I HAD BROKEN UP MONTHS AFTER THIS HE D&D'd me AND I WENT NC I FOUND THIS ONLINE DATED WHEN THESE TEXTS WERE BEING SENT!!!!! WTF?! I typed my name into google never thinking I would find....this. Female | Las Vegas, NV Insane Gold Digger Posted By: TornSoulUser Verified

#24 Nov 17 - 11AM (Reply to #13)

RubyWoo

Oh my, what an ass!!! What I

Oh my, what an ass!!! What I don't get is, if they are so "sad over losing us" and they feel they made such a big mistake, why did they do it? Surely when he was taking off his clothes he could have stopped for a minute and not fucked someone else?

#25 Nov 17 - 12PM (Reply to #14)

Used

they are sad over losing us,

they are sad over losing us, cos they never thought they would lose us.....given the way we were treated and still stayed with them and what we put up with, why would we not be putting up with it still....Thats why its called NARC INJURY...cos usually you dont see an INJURY COMING UNTIL ITS TO LATE... so thats why they act like they do, and always have....if they tried to walk a mile in our shoes and get to know us, they would see that we were going off them, BUT THEY NEVER DO AND NEVER WILL...LOL

#26 Nov 17 - 5PM (Reply to #15)

RubyWoo

I guess you're right. He

I guess you're right. He thinks now by saying "I made a mistake, I hope you forgive" he will make it better. If he was truly sorry he would be right at my doorstep crying and begging like a baby. A text is just lazy. I just hope I can stop getting these mental images of him naked with another woman whispering in her ear what he used to whisper in mine...

#27 Nov 17 - 8AM (Reply to #11)

not-there-yet

are you kidding?

It's a good thing, I wish I had proof of mine having visited someone else's insides lol. It's amazing high ground. Now he's officially disgusting, and you can use this as a trampoline to bounce away from him.

#28 Nov 17 - 8AM

Hunter

LOL ...

LOL ... Delete,delete,delete Hunter

#29 Nov 17 - 7AM

Winter

Pathetic narc

See, how much happy he is? Disordered! They all use the same lines. I received this BS many times. Just ignore, don't give him even negative supply. Your silence gives you power.

#30 Nov 17 - 7AM

Used

rubywoo

Ive had this text identical words....lol...been there done that, ignored that......NC AGAINXX

#31 Nov 17 - 7AM (Reply to #5)

RubyWoo

Hahaha priceless! I will

Hahaha priceless! I will totally ignore it. I agree with him though, he made the biggest mistake of his life and I was the best woman he's met.

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