"Heartbreak": How Rejection Literally Stops Your Heart

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#1 Sep 29 - 4PM
Anonymous (not verified)
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"Heartbreak": How Rejection Literally Stops Your Heart

http://healthland.time.com/2010/09/29/heartbrake-how-rejection-literally...

Saw this article, thought it might be a good read on here:

"Heartbreak": How Rejection Literally Stops Your Heart
By John Cloud Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Had I been given a choice, I would have preferred being born into a species that doesn't need as much social interaction as humans do. For instance, I like to believe, vainly, that I would have been a decent great white shark. Great whites like the attention of close friends, but most of the time they hunt alone. More likely, I could have been a fantastic maned sloth, one of those weird little mammals that consumes a lot of the green world and almost never comes down from the treetops.

As it is, I'm part of a species that is so bad at being rejected that social denial lights up our central nervous systems. We've known this for some time: lab participants who watch as photos of them are rejected — even if they know the rejection is being done by a computer — experience not just emotional but physical distress. Your levels of cortisol, a stress hormone, fluctuate when you think you're being rejected. It turns out that all of us are the nerdy kids on Glee: pathetic and weak when Sue Sylvester comes around, even if we know she's a robot dressed in a sweatsuit. (More on Time.com: Science Says: Cost of Love Is Two Old Friends)

This week a new study shows that these physical effects go further: rejection actually stops your heart. Thus the clever title of the new Psychological Science paper: "The Heartbrake of Social Rejection." The authors of the study — a three-member group led by a University of Amsterdam psychologist named Bregtje Gunther Moor — measured beat-by-beat heart rate changes in 22 students as they received either rejection or acceptance of portrait photos they had submitted. When hooked up to electrocardiogram monitors, the students reliably showed a skip in their hearts when they thought they had been rejected by someone shown their photos.

Brutally, the students were also asked to estimate whether the faces in the photos were older or younger than 21. The same heart-skip showed up when participants thought they were being judged as older. (More on Time.com: Not Faking It: Why a Placebo Can Improve Sex Life)

Like most Psychological Science articles, this one suggests no antidote to the physical problems associated with rejection. But the findings help explain how evolution programs human sociability. We are meant to find comfort in one another — through chemical means, if necessary — and not to be loners.

More on Time.com:

Read more: http://healthland.time.com/2010/09/29/heartbrake-how-rejection-literally...

Oct 1 - 1AM
Susan32
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The GLEE reference

Interesting the article mentions the narcissistic Sue Sylvester. FOX has used promos with "Sue vs. Schue" in which Mr. Schuester "wants to make the world a better place" and Sylvester wants to "ruin everything." What's funny is that Sue's jabs at Schue involve... his vanity over personal appearance. In some ways, Will Schuester is the quintessential somatic narcissist (the actor, Matthew Morrison, even has a personal assistant shave his chest hair so it's not too shaggy so he can shag young women) He LOVES HIS HAIR. But in other ways, Will is the psychopath, worse than Sue. In the "Ballads" episode of the first season- 1)Will "punishes" the cheerleader Rachel (Lea Michele) for being infatuated with him. He makes her do menial household chores with his shrewish wife. 2)He takes her the bedside of a comatose student who attempted suicide because he rejected her. For added strangeness... the nerdy student who attempted suicide looks like the OW for whom the ex-P D&D'd me. Weird. 3)Rachel APOLOGIZES for having a crush on Will. How dare she be human&consider him physically attractive! 4)Will tells Rachel that she's infatuated with him due to low self-esteem,and says one day she will find a man who will truly respect her... as if teachers aren't supposed to respect their students? Huh? With the exception of #2, it sounds like the D&D with the ex-Psych professor. Really. Most "Gleeks" (GLEE fans) think Will's treatment is over-the-top and say "What? Haven't students been infatuated with him before? His treatment of Rachel is out of line." Sue doesn't drive students to attempt suicide... yikes...
Sep 29 - 5PM
kiwi10
kiwi10's picture

whats also interesting that

whats also interesting that we learn in psychology is how bad feelings release chemicals into our system that we become addicted to. i know that heart dropping feeling hurt like hell, but it was familiar... from my whole life. and somehow masochisticaly erotic (gross)
Sep 29 - 5PM
ShaynasMommy
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Perhaps...

This is why the word "offensive" seems to be appropriate as an expected response to an N or a P. Yes, we are outraged by their actions, but I think "offensive" the most accurate adjective to describe these nutters, as they go against everything that humans were genetically and emotionally programmed to be with one another. When I step back from my own experiences with an N, and try to see with the eyes of an "outsider" I can see why they should all be thrown in a room somewhere, or at the very least ostracized for life. I can see why a person, when informed for the first time what a Narc is and having no experience of them would just say "Ewww." Its the same natural response as someone who just stepped in a pile of dog shit.
Sep 29 - 4PM
hooklineandsinker
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Very interesting and

Very interesting and profoundly depressing and disturbing. I remember around the time I knew the D&D was coming (this was about a week before he dumped me). I was walking along a street in my city on my way to the bank and I was sobbing uncontrollably. I literally stopped in my tracks on this public street, kind of swayed on my feet, as if I was about to faint or something, and actually felt like I was disappearing, like I was ceasing to exist, like I was being annihilated, cancelled out, snuffed out. Deep, deep emotional and somatic distress and deeply traumatic to go through. So I'm not one bit surprised that it affects your actual bodily organs in a quantifiable way.
Sep 29 - 4PM (Reply to #2)
ShaynasMommy
ShaynasMommy's picture

that's a very astute example,

Hook, our bodies and minds are so conected. Yes, you felt like you were being snuffed out because you were! He was systematically killing you on the inside emotionally and spiritually so you could "feel" just like him....actually feel nothing at all.
Oct 4 - 8PM (Reply to #3)
onwithmylife
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THE Devil was fighting for my Soul

that was what I felt like for so long but still stayed there, when he D and D'ed me I got an anxiety attack for the first time in my life. ////but it is nice to know, smile on my face, that he is desperate and depraved as we speak, no supply, yipeee................law of karma