"Im incompatible with women"

9 posts / 0 new

#1 Oct 13 - 3PM

fooled no longer

"Im incompatible with women"

"Im incompatible with women"
no kidding, why dont you wear that label plastered on your f.. ing forehead so women can see you coming.
We argued today because after watching the Chilean miners being rescued, I asked him if he ever thinks about if he was in their position how he would feel, and what he would do when he escaped death.
His answer: I never think about things like that, I never worry about how I would feel if you died because there is nothing Ive left undone no, I have no guilt about that.

BIG FLASHING RED LACK OF EMPATHY BUTTON AGAIN!!!

#2 Oct 13 - 5PM

mystwoman

Mine said something similar

Mine said something similar to me as well. He then promptly tried to save face by telling me, "But you're not like OTHER woman". WTH did he think I was...a man in drag or something? lol. Of course, this is the same person that tried to tell me later in our relationship that "a woman should KNOW when she's pushing a man 'too far' so that he doesn't hit her". He said this in front of one of my best friends and she promptly ripped him a new a$$hole over it. According to my xnh, he was also deaf, but only in the frequency range of a woman's voice (specifically the range of MY voice). I'll give him an "A" for creativity on that one. It's complete bullsh*t...but original.

______________________________________________________
God sometimes removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.

#3 Oct 13 - 3PM

Briseis

Which begs the question . .

Which begs the question . . . . Why are you with a woman? What a contemptuous man. He must really find you disgusting, that you would hang around with him in spite of his "incompatibility".

#4 Oct 13 - 4PM (Reply to #2)

fooled no longer

incompatible

He tells me this daily sometimes. it his get out clause for everything that goes wrong or that he doesnt want to do. I told you incompatible with women. Ive asked him what he is doing with one then and he refuses to answer. Just gives the sneer. Really i tried so hard for so many years to prove him wrong and be the one who was different because he hooked me in with the bait of " thought you would be different but youre not. Nice man right? So heres my response now, Im completely incompatible with arsewipes like you.

#5 Oct 13 - 4PM (Reply to #3)

Briseis

He's pretty compatible with

He's pretty compatible with little girls, though. Do you wonder what's up with all that trying, for so many years to be the one that was different? Differerent than what? Different than the women who would run screaming from such a disgusting low life Mama's boy? Who has the art of child molesting "down" so well that the little girl he molested is "OK now"????? Whoa. I read your story a week or so ago, and just took another look at it now. Him being "incompatible with women" is the least of your worries :( Where are you at in this relationship? This board is hard to search for any other information you've already given :)

#6 Oct 13 - 4PM (Reply to #4)

fooled no longer

youre right Briseis

Dear Briseis you are right. I have lots to worry about. I dont love him anymore. I despise him. Im getting myself into a better financial state and my citizenship sorted and then he will roast for all I care. Three months married and hating it. He still claims that this incident with the child happened when he was a child so its forgiveable. It was shelved away as a secret for 8 years of our relationship. I think hes afraid I will tell family, (his mother apparently knows and did nothing about it at the time). On the advice of SAM Vaknin, Ive considered it! They probably wont beleive me. I used to think he needed therapy about it, now i just think he needs new DNA and the absence of me who makes him look more normal. Need I say some of his underling workmates and the community think hes a saint.

#7 Oct 13 - 4PM (Reply to #5)

Briseis

It might not feel like it

It might not feel like it now . . . but you are one of our stronger examples, one who get's it early on. Yeah, whatever about he was only a child. A 14 year old knows right from wrong. Dare I say that the WORST of this is him insisting the little girl is "OK now"? He definitely needs new DNA. That's a nice way of saying it would have been better for at least two women I'm thinking of if he'd never been born. You know he's not a saint, and that's all that matters. He can go along benefiting from the world thinking he's a saint too, and probably will, long after you've gotten free. He's one of a billion "saints" running around breaking hearts, destroying souls and needing a tire track from the Karma Bus across his ugly face. I'm just curious about your plans to get out. Do you live in the states or across the pond? Where is your naturalized citizenship? Where is your family? Can they help you?

#8 Oct 13 - 5PM (Reply to #6)

fooled no longer

getting out Briseis

Thanks for your encouragement. I was the one who gave advice to many people about relationships but I fell into this bear trap, because it was so well disguised. I try to help others even now its the way im mending my self esteem. I cut off from my roots to live in Europe with this man. My parents passed away 15 years ago. My children are grown and live 10,000 miles away. I try to save up to travel 14 hour flights to see them or to bring them here each year. Thats why they I have no savings. I had major leg operation 2 years back which limited my autonomy, which he took full advantage of. I was always waiting for my residence. I am now eligiable in my own right. after 6 years of residence ( apart from marrying him) My status is complicated, without this I could not earn my living here. Earning money here helps me to help my children, my son (who is now married) developed childhood diabetes and I help him with medical aid. Im ashamed to say I did such a good job of making this man seem the hero, that no-one would believe me, especially not my children. I feel like I should just detach and then get stronger and let him bear some of the costs of me becoming what I was before he met me, a Confident, happy, loving compassionate person who had had a lot of success in her life. These men dont normally prey on the weak they prey on strong, confident succcessful women more. Thanks for your care, really helped me put things in perspective. I will keep being true to myself now, and will stay on the board.

#9 Oct 13 - 5PM (Reply to #7)

Briseis

Sounds so much like what

Sounds so much like what happened with me. All my family ever heard was what a wonderful person exN was. I refused to tell them anything else, because then I would have to admit it to myself, and then get to experience the intense pain of my "lies" and even more, my "stupidity" for getting myself in that situation to begin with :( :( :( So there I was, in a cabin in the mountains, surrounded by a farm that I'd come to love, with a major methamphetamine addict who threatened to beat the crap out of me almost as often as he professed to love me. "Hi Mom! Yeah, we're fine. ExNarc disappeared again and I'm watching thousands of dollars drain from the bank accounts, yeah, probably meth. Just gotta keep myself from getting AIDS or hepatitic C, that's how I'm doing today! How about yourself??" The life I was living up there was a complete secret. The townsfolk all seemed to like and respect him. That he'd told everyone he was a retired DOCTOR and had half a million bucks in the bank probably had something to do with that. I get that particular kind of "shame isolation". I really do. There's no way out but through. And for me, breaking through my shame was more of a relief than I ever thought it would be. No one despised me, or cast me away for being such a lying airheaded abuse victim. People CARED. They just wanted me to be OK.

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