Jealousy?

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#1 Jan 24 - 6AM
Emma
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Jealousy?

Morning ladies.

Do narcs get jealous at all? Or is that feeling avoid like most other feelings?

If they feel their supply is moving on and starting anew...what are they likely to do?

Jan 24 - 10PM
emtg
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Jealousy and projection

Yup - mine got jealous all the time - and accused of me of insane things. I would go to walgreens and he would accuse me of lying about it. I think it is because of their deep insecurity of feelings of worthlessness but also of projecting how they are. Lisa says in her book about surviving a narcissist that you should watch out for everything they accuse you of as this is what they do and thus think other people do as well. I think they hoover until they know for sure you are done and then in my experience, leave you alone. however, they have to know you truly are done. this took a lot of ignoring and deleting on my part.
Jan 24 - 10PM
Deidre40
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yes, he was very jealous. and

yes, he was very jealous. and operated on a double standard. he could have tons of female friends...i could not have male friends. etc etc. main reason they are so jealous, is because they are so very insecure.
Jan 24 - 8PM
purplekaty
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Mine also

insanely jealous we worked together in a resturant and if I got more tables,better tips, better schedule whatever he went nuts and that was one of my red flags I could not even talk to a male co-worker he went off ...crazy jealous Thank God I don't have to put up with that anymore (he got fired) totally helps with the NC even though he is still trying to contct me ...I DELETE,DELETE,DELETE
Jan 24 - 6PM
onwithmylife
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mine

was insanely jealous, one day a neighbor and his 5 year old daughter were helping me change a toilet seat in the upstairs master bedroom, narc drives into my garage sees the man coming down the stairs with his daughter, and takes off without saying a word, like he saw a ghost, yea right the moron thought I was screwing the neighbor , what a nutjob...........
Jan 24 - 4PM
missym
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I never once in 18 years

I never once in 18 years together felt jealousy from him. Not in the usual sense of the term. I think this is because he thinks he is god's gift, and I was not worthy of it in an attractiveness, sexual, physical sense of jealousy. He could never really "see" my beauty and sensuality and how much other men "get it". He never did. His huge disconnect to me - his wife, and his lack of any type of "protectiveness"...not meaning love equates jealousy in a pathological way....BUT, I think if you are deeply connected (in a way narcs cannot genuinely)....and desire to be "that" for one another, then a healthy amount of jealousy shows your relationship is valued and you'll protect it. He NEVER felt that toward me. However, he was deeply envious of me and others whom he felt less around. Narcs feel tremendous envy.
Jan 24 - 3PM
RubyWoo
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Mine was never jealous, never

Mine was never jealous, never thought any other man could like me I guess. It used to bother me a little... Made me feel incredibly unattractive as well.
Jan 24 - 11AM
TNR1
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I wouldn't say that Mr. N was

I wouldn't say that Mr. N was jealous as much as entitled. He used to complain all the time about what he deserved that he did not have or about situations that he felt he was right about while others were wrong. When he complained about people, it was often about the fact that he had done something or given something for/to them and they had not thanked him or given him proper props about it.
Jan 24 - 11AM
Im_always_fine
Im_always_fine's picture

Jealous of old

Jealous of old friends..jealous of my son...jealous of my calls with my dad...jealous if I got a hair cut and he didn't. I think it was just an EXCUSE for emotional turmoil. He's ADDICTED to drama...he's not happy unless everyone's unhappy!
Jan 24 - 9AM
MandyM
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I don't know if it's jealousy

I don't know if it's jealousy so much as it is control.
Jan 24 - 5PM (Reply to #3)
star17
star17's picture

Mandy your exactly

Mandy your exactly right...it's about control and their ego...if anyone is a threat to them losing their control they rage...but don't confuse it with caring...they simply don't want to lose the control they have gained over us.
Jan 24 - 8AM
needing2know
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I have read somewhere that

I have read somewhere that they are not jealous, they actually think in their minds that it is NEVER truly over that's why they come back, they say that when you go NC the narcs attitude is "how dare she move on without me" that's all they care about, I don't think they really give a rats ass if we are with someone else. But I could be wrong. I have never in all my reading about this disorder found that they are jealous. But at this point in the mess I really don't care if he is or not, I don't care what he does or what he thinks. I know from experience that when I have moved on and started dating, the ex always came around to try and break up a current relationship, He was with someone else, but still wanted me to hang on a thread just in case he needed something from me. It just all about control and what they can get.