Is it possible for men & women to be just friends?
Is it possible for men & women to be just friends?
I received this e mail from my neighbor today (he's single). He sent a msg telling me about 2 of his relatives dying. He seemed surprised that 2 would die at the same time and ponders what's going on. I respond that our families are aging along with us & this is just what happens in life. This was his reply:
" I don't know about you but i quit aging when i reached 45..And speaking from the viewpoint of experience, for an 'older' lady you're in great shape. If I had the energy I would chase you around a block or two. Don't ask what I would do if I caught you cause I forgot.....me"
I've known this guy for about 12 years & he's tried to move in on me several times. I tell him I'm not interested & that he's old enough to be my father. His daughter is 2 years younger than me. Last week I saw a former co worker at a club. I see him once a month or so. He buys me a drink, I buy him a drink, no big deal. As I'm leaving, he asks if I want to go home with him. "No thanks buddy. I'm not interested & besides, you are married". Then he asks for a kiss. I told him how disrespectful he was. Earlier this year my gf's & I were celebrating my BD at a pub & a "friend" who I've known for 30 years is fawning over me & plants a full on kiss on my mouth with his wife standing next to him. I wanted to smack him but his wife was embarrassed & I didn't want to create a scene. There are more tales like this & it's not just in social settings. Recently 2 professional male acquaintances (both married) were flattering me & hinted about my availability.
I have talked with my therapist about this. I don't think I am giving off sexual signals but maybe unconsciously? My therapist has known me for 6 years. She tells me that men today assume that a single woman living alone is horny & why not give it a shot? I am not a super model. I do take care of myself and dress conservatively. I don't flirt & will call guys out if they talk inappropriately in front of me. But I am friendly & outgoing with almost everyone. I refuse to change my friendly manner just b/c of these dick wads. I have stopped going to certain places b/c I just don't want to deal with it. There are plenty of places to go so this isn't a big loss for me. The odd thing is that it's almost always with men I've known a long time.
Does anyone else have these experiences? Am I making too much of this? I feel that it's disrespectful. I believe they think they are flattering me. I'm not interested in flattery. I want to have friends of both genders but I'm finding that my circle of male friends is dwindling. Until I can come to some peace about this, I will not be dating. I don't trust men b/c they have proven to me that they can't be trusted. Any thoughts on this would be greatly appreciated. Thx S & A
S&A
Thx TTTH
^^ This.
Yes
Honesty and tact
No worries ICB
Good!
IB
Careful!
Lol, your neighbor is a turd
Yes, after I posted I saw
Yes since I got divorced I
I know exactly how you feel Tori
This MARRIED dick wad dirty
You misunderstood
What's wrong with
You raise a good point
1 out of 25 are PD.. So they
Shock and Awesome
It seems like this recovery brings me a new hurdle
I got
Cool
S&A
Agree....being single can
Good idea
Laci
What do you mean "that
As much as I'd like to say you are wrong, I can't
Yes
Laci