Anyone?

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#1 Feb 12 - 11AM
justicejones
justicejones's picture

Anyone?

Does anyone go to the new site anymore? This used to be the site I frequented everyday...then when AAR started, I went to that one. It doesn't seem like anyone is there anymore. Have you all retreated back to good old AAH? Maybe this site is more for those who are still in the early stages of recovery and AAR is more for those who are moving past the initial shock and hurt of their Narc? Any thoughts?

Feb 13 - 3PM
ally2375
ally2375's picture

Site enhancement suggestions

First, I just want to say how incredibly grateful I am to Lisa, the site developers and moderators of this site. As so many others have said, this site has been an incredible resource for me and I am so glad to have found it. Even if nothing at all changed in this site's features of functionality, I would still love it. However, here are a couple of features that may be nice additions when the site is refreshed. 1) The ability to connect with/send private messages to other members. 2) The ability to know when someone has replied to your post within a thread. 3) The ability to edit/add profile information. It would be nice to see members' locations (easier to connect with others nearby) see links to members' stories (I can't always remember everyone's story, it would be a nice reminder) Those are just my thoughts. I can't wait to see the new site and read the new book!
Feb 13 - 5PM (Reply to #16)
Lisa E. Scott
Lisa E. Scott's picture

Ally

Thanks for the suggestions. All great ideas, especially the feature letting you know when someone has replied to your post. Oh, and having each individual's story easier to access...another great idea! I'm definitely looking into this. Thank you! :)
Feb 13 - 12PM
helldweller
helldweller's picture

justice jones

I have to admit that the new site really does seem more for those who have gotten on with it. That's a great thing and I want to get there, but I feel like this old site is for the "bastard children" of the site LOL where I can let it all hang out and still be sucking my thumb and pacing LOL I guess I don't feel ready yet :(
Feb 13 - 2PM (Reply to #14)
Scoop
Scoop's picture

Helldweller

"Bastard children".. high five sister lol
Feb 13 - 8AM
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

Ya know...

if they could add a chat and private message feature to this one that would be awesome!
Feb 12 - 8PM
Journey
Journey's picture

This forum is easier I find

I am always logged into both sites and the chat feature is absolutely wonderful. I've enjoyed that particularly, but often when I look to see if anyone is also online, I am the only one. The new sites have a lot of cool features, like notifications when people comment on your post and others that you subscribe to (which is default when you make a comment I think). I even like seeing everyone's pics though I am hesitant to show my own face still at this point. Having a profile is pretty cool too. It makes it way easier to find your own comments on threads you might want to keep track of. What I do find really difficult is the forum itself. Having categories makes older topics easier to find, but I don't like the way the comments are laid out at all. I like to post right under someone the way it is here in response and the new forum doesn't allow that 'threading', therefore I find reading the comments with a through line of conversation more difficult. On this site the forum may be more old school as far as the web tech goes, but I find it way easier to both read and comment. I will continue to stay close to both, but I find the focus separation a bit distracting too. When I start a new topic now I want to post it on both sites which just disturbs my sense of continuity for the comments and responses - lol! There is a much better sense of order to the forum over there and in the long run once several topic posts exist, THAT will make it easier than this forum to read the topics that apply to each stage of our recovery. Also, it will help prevent new topics being created which only repeat ones created longer ago. Instead new comers can add to existing threads when it is essentially the same discussion and have way more comments to read which will help answer particular dilemmas. Anyway, like everyone else here I so appreciate BOTH for their intent and community so I'll be found on either :) Journey on...

Journey on...

Feb 12 - 8PM (Reply to #11)
justicejones
justicejones's picture

It takes a while to load

It takes a while to load responses on my computer with the new site...but what i do like is that you know when people have responded to your posts or you can keep track of what you posted or reponded to without having to remember the exact name of the subject you responded to. On this site, you have to go through each topic to remember which ones you posted on. I like to know when people respond, like a conversation...this forum you have to search and the other one, you get notifications. Its like a continuation of a conversation. That is a nice feature.
Feb 12 - 6PM
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

Y'all are gonna laugh at me

Y'all are gonna laugh at me but its a trauma bond lol. No seriously I mean we all came here and gut wrenching pain. Its we the abused all found a sanctuary together. I really think there is something to it. I will say I like the new site just no one is ever on there. We are still over here huddled in the storm cellar hiding from those freaks of nature
Feb 12 - 7PM (Reply to #9)
newpage
newpage's picture

LOL sick of it! It is a

LOL sick of it! It is a bond, for sure! In fact, I think I finally decided to post after reading for months because I had an anxiety that I might miss my chance. I knew the bus was leaving and I had to hop on! I'm sure the other site is great, but there is something here that looks visually, or that feels, warmer- less clinical..
Feb 12 - 6PM (Reply to #8)
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture

sickofit

funny woman, this is my home, huddled with all my friends, it was where I first began to feel human again after the years of abuse
Feb 12 - 5PM
really
really's picture

I have to agree w/ OWML.

I have to agree w/ OWML. This one is just plain easier. I think the other required you to categorize your issue (Step 1, 2, etc). I'm sure it will make sense once there is an "official" reference point like the new book and if that's how you make it to the site. But, for people who are referred from other sources or completely unschooled on the topic, it makes it difficult. I mean no disrespect to those that worked so hard to put it together. I just worry that the people that really need it the most, that are freshest to the N experience, may not know where to go once they hit the board. And, it is quiet over there.
Feb 12 - 3PM
prettypeeved
prettypeeved's picture

I do find it a bit odd that

I do find it a bit odd that people on that site have face pics. I remember it being mentioned when I joined that you shouldn't really use names, pics etc. for privacy purposes. Otherwise...the new site seems a bit empty to me.
Feb 12 - 3PM (Reply to #5)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Privacy settings

I think AAR has privacy settings, so such profile pics are hidden. I certainly hope so. I don't even use my real name here. It's a safety issue.
Feb 12 - 2PM
Goldie
Goldie's picture

Not sure

Perhaps as Onwithmylife says, people have preferences. When Lisa's book comes out, we will be concentrating on the recovery aspects for all the different levels of healing. Where you feel comfortable is best and some like both. They do offer many options between the two. So glad to have you here Justice, your recovery and openness is a power of example for all of us. Goldie
Feb 12 - 1PM
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture

Hi justice jones

to be truthful, i have always liked this site , quick, easy to use and read, easy to post. I know a lot of work has been put into that site and I have looked in on it from time to time, but THIS is where I feel the most comfortable.One day or 5 years out to me does not make a difference in which site to use, I like the ease of this good ole one!
Feb 13 - 11AM (Reply to #2)
sadderbutwiser
sadderbutwiser's picture

new site

i'm glad i read these comments today. even though i'm 8 months NC, i still have not tried the new site yet. i just love this one. i still feel it is helping me so much. i also like feeling like i might be helping some of the newbies with my posts because i have learned SO MUCH about narcs and PD's in all of my researching for about a year. i was starting to get worried that all of the people that i love on here would be defecting to the new site.