D&D Ceremony

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#1 Mar 7 - 4AM

ImStrong

D&D Ceremony

I remember when I asked the narc for a glass of water after hours of tourtured oral for him..he would not get me the water..i asked him three times..it was so strange..i know understand why. He was literaly thinking what will benefit him if he brings me this glass of water..

That day was also my d&d day we had a huge argument before and he was alreafy locked in with the ow..who betwenn having sex with me he was on aim with her saying kissy face..which I asked him about and he lied and said he saysthat to everyone.

The d&d started that day like a ritual or ceremony..he ignored me wh we n I came baring gifts ..breakfaast I made at home.. First it took him almost 15 minutes to answer the door fully aware it was me. Then he ignored me for almo sd t 20 minutes by beeing online talking to everyone under the sun including the ow..infront of my face..then he ate my food..then throwed a sheet on the floor..because I was being degraded so I didnt deserve the bed..i guessed now..aftet he said hes taking a shower I better be burt naked when he comes out..i gelt weird about that..i left on my bra..this was all a.ceremony of D&D..the sex was machine like and as if I was a masterbation toy to him..very programmed and persistant..he ac th ually rf old.me he f ed lt lik ed beaten someone up yesterday because his mom made him angry..so he beaten up my p$ssy..because he cant beat someone up..i was a toy to him not human..after the straining sex..he wanted me to do his here..it was a D&D.cermony for the king..i was discarded soon after..most confusinv day, of my life..but today after nc..it all makes somuch sense

D&D cermony

#2 Mar 7 - 5AM

ImStrong

Corections made for better reading..damn touchscreen :)

I realized now,what made me stay.. Was the keep taking me back ..he kept taking me back affer a argument..no guy did that..i thought he was soecial..when now I realized he is incapable of understanding how I feel..so he takes me back as easy as chewing gum..if he knew how much emotions i felt or had some outlook like a normal guy who has emotions and can relate yo their partner..he would not take me back everytime..why because he wouldnt want to use me or string me along. I remember when I asked the narc for a glass of water after hours of tourtured oral for him..he would not get me the water..i asked him three times..it was so strange..i know understand why. He was literaly thinking what will benefit him if he brings me this glass of water.. That day was also my d&d day we had a huge argument before and he was alreafy locked in with the ow..who betwenn having sex with me he was on aim with her saying kissy face..which I asked him about and he lied and said he saysthat to everyone. The d&d started that day like a ritual or ceremony..he ignored me wh we n I came baring gifts ..breakfaast I made at home.. First it took him almost 15 minutes to answer the door fully aware it was me. Then he ignored me for almost 20 minutes by beeing online talking to everyone under the sun including the ow..infront of my face..then he ate my food..then throwed a sheet on the floor..because I was being degraded so I didnt deserve the bed..i guessed now..after he said hes taking a shower I better be butt naked when he comes out..i gelt weird about that..i left on my bra..this was all a.ceremony of D&D..the sex was machine like and as if I was a masterbation toy to him..very programmed and persistant..he acually told me he felt like beaten someone up yesterday because his mom made him angry..so he beaten up my p$ssy..because he cant beat someone up..i was a toy to him not human..after the straining sex..he wanted me to do his here..it was a D&D.cermony for the king..i was discarded soon after..most confusinv day, of my life..but today after nc..it all makes somuch sense D&D cermony

"In the fiery pit lays a man with two faces.One is the face of a God and the other a face of the Devil.Beware He lurks your souls.Keep one hand on your heart and the other hand over your eyes. Let him walk pass you not into you.Ghost of love will possess

#3 Mar 7 - 9AM (Reply to #7)

Scoop

My goodness the same happened

My goodness the same happened to me sweetie and it is a cermony , its where you see the mask fully off and you are gob smacked . The shame is unbereable . I swear no one would believe us if we told them the full extent of the humilation involved in the D&D . and knowing that tomorrow they could knock on the door as if nothing has happened . This is their sickness , their anger their twisted view of whats right and wrong ... my heart gose out to you , and the throwing of the sheet on the floor .... yep i had that happen to me just after he beat me up . You will get over this , let it be known right how you did nothing wrong , you where a victum of a psycopath , an incidious abuser , we all know how you feel , i dont think unless you have been through this kind of abuse people could ever understand how deeply it hurts us and shakes us to the core .. big love Scoop x

#4 Mar 7 - 10AM (Reply to #8)

ImStrong

Thankyou scoop I feel happy

Thankyou scoop I feel happy to have you all in my life..im feel safe here xx

#5 Mar 7 - 11AM (Reply to #9)

Scoop

I have just been to a meeting

I have just been to a meeting and youre post was with me all through it .You know sometimes being on the board triggers my ptsd but kind of in a safe way if that makes sence , i gain such comfort from you guys . We are safe here . xx

#6 Mar 7 - 6AM (Reply to #4)

IncognitoBurrito

I'm Strong

Holy *hit! There is NOTHING, do you hear me? NOTHING even CLOSE to resembling *LOVE* anywhere in that story! He would be BEHIND BARS, if you had turned him in for that kind of lewd crap. That's a whole new level of insidious behavior. I can't even... There's a special place in HELL for that guy. Have you been able to speak with anyone in your hometown about these incidences? How are you doing? I was reading the psychforum-narcissism threads, up until 2 am last night. One of the guys described "supply" in interesting terms. He explained that the more ATTENTION, the more YOU ARE WILLING to DO for them, the better the supply. He said,"The more needy she is, the better!" Gross, completely nasty. You are NOT a piece of TRASH to be used, abused, and discarded. I hope to God you know that. xo

#7 Mar 7 - 7AM (Reply to #5)

ImStrong

Im doing the best I

Im doing the best I could..all I have is my family invluding my narc mom who I pitty she could be a beautiful person minus the rage..i have zero friends who I now recall are narc themselves or had some narc in them..they were mean and twofaced.. They also d&d what friendship I thought was real..and cried years over..i still effects me to thia day my to closes friends droped me after there babies..they were twofaced before the kids..my life now all makes sense

#8 Mar 7 - 3PM (Reply to #6)

michele115 (not verified)

Imstrong

We are going to support one another and get eachother shored up... You need to get all of this out. I'm wondering...do you have a therapist to work this out with...it certainly leads me to suspect you might even have some trauma... OMG...my blood is boiling...it was sick what he did to you. I don't have to give you a speil...I know you know he's disordered...the goal here is to get you back in shape...and perhaps since you and UGH I can't see the poster...I think it's sick of it but not sure...there is another poster on this thread who said she went through the same thing...perhaps you two will have a lot you can bounce off eachother as well via pvt message or something...it helps a lot when some have very similar experiences. As a whole we all share the same expeirence, but the details are what create the distinctions... Let it out...share, get on this board and let it be your lifeline... AND...I don't want to poke too much but we also need to see if with the help of therapy and talking it out here we can figure out not so much why you ended up with him...but what caused you to allow it... BUT I don't want to trigger you now...you've said enough for today...and you need to go at your own pace...I don't mean it in a sense that I get to measure how much you say...but I don't want to "push" too hard? But I think it would be helpful if one of the goals was exploring that some. You're offline now...so I'll either catch you later or tomorrow... Sending hugs and vibes of comfort... I'm shaking my head... P.S. I just noted it was SCOOP!

#9 Mar 7 - 5AM (Reply to #2)

michele115 (not verified)

ImStrong

This was very hard to read...I can only imagine how hard it was to write it...and I'm not talking about the touch screen challenges, I'm referring to the content... You express that it's all making sense now... I was motified reading this...how are you holding up?

#10 Mar 7 - 6AM (Reply to #3)

ImStrong

Thankyou michelle for

Thankyou michelle for asking.. Everyday is a challenge..but im a strong girl...and ive been staying alone much to get my head around everything that has happen to me even the D&D Ceremony..and also I will like to note he hated oral..but that day he wanted it only to degrade and destroy my innerself..it felt like a well, planned out ritual..a ceremony of the spirit..i left abused..bruised..and dillusional unaware on what will be next..the worst and most embarrising day of my life with a man..i was stripped naked and fcked on the floor likea dog...incapable to even have a glass of water to drink..i was left lost traumitised and in fear. I did not experience such a thing ever..it was trully a D&D Ceremony

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