Antonia's story
Antonia's story
My ex and I broke up 7ish months ago, (well he locked me and my kids out of our home in a what I now know was a Narcisstic Rage due to an injury I had caused him by telling him he needed to get some help with his depressive/explosivly angry mood swings). After much tooing and froing, I am now NC and have been for two weeks,each day is an achievment and I can't believe how much easier it all is getting now, however I do still wait for my mobile to 'beep' or an e-mail or msn message, which deep down I kind of want to get just so I can ignore him.
In the past 7 months I think I have made all the mistakes you can make after doing much reading on this website and reading every one else's experiences and advice, he would want to come back to me, I would eventually agree, then within days he would pull away and it would be over again, and I would be devastated.... again.
He is currently on his third girlfriend since our split, and I know he will be completely throwing himself into this latest girl, giving her the 'pretend wonderful guy' I thought I had found too. She'll learn, I actually feel kind of sorry for her and I hope she is stronger than I was back then, although I am just relieved it isn't me. Actually after the other two ladies he briefly dated, had ended he would txt me late at night completely bereft and depressed, and I would supply him, tell him it was ok, he'll be fine, he had me (as a friend) blah blah, he quickly disappeared again afterwards. I know so much more now.
When we split I knew nothing of Narcissism or depression (he admitted being diagnosed with Dysthymia after we split- I think now he wanted me to feel sorry for him and forgive him at the time which is the only reason he admitted that to me - might have been nice to know he had depression prior to moving myself and my children in with him... hmmm) we had the pretty much typical wonderful beginning, then when he knew he had me totally believing in him and thinking I was 'in love' it all changed very quickly...
Sorry this is so long, but I guess what I am getting to is yes I do check, not every day, just sometimes, and I know in time that will completely stop... Guess I also deep down just want the chance to ignore him, so he know's this time I am completely gone now.
I think you are right..
Missing Him
Hi agnes, when did he stop
```Live,Laugh,love```
empty 68
How NC is going...
Similarities
So True!
Emotional Roller Coaster
Thanks
Antonia
rage
Antonia
http://hubpages.com/hub/Married-to-a-Narcissist?preview
nolongercontrolled
welcome