big head and cold

I have just found this site and i need to tell my story with people who know what im going through .
My NB has just ended things for the 3rd time im one year . He uses abandonment as a weapon i am now lead to believe as it happens after i point out his behaviour has been abusive . This time i found out some terrible news about my mother having lung cancer . I said i wanted to see him as i felt very shocked he said dont come round as he wasnt ready to see me after a diagreement we had a few days before .He finaly agreed i could go to his house and instead of comforting me he dumped me on the samne day i find out this news and in his head he has done nothing wrong even saying "what if your mother gets really sick then i would be stuck with you forever "
this was last week and i am left in a feeling of hurt , shock but thanks to this site i am realising i was with narcissist man . In the past year i have noticed a slow slipping of his mask to the point that everything really did become about him . Abusive comments and a slow chipping away at my self esteem too subtle to pin point . He refered to me having problems which he was helping me with and i kept thinking i dont have any problems (apart from being with him ).he set up a pupil teacher thing which made me think i consently had things to learn from him .the day i had really bad tooth ache i told him about it and he threatened to leave me about 5 mins later . It almost feels that when i was down he wanted to push me down further fogive me if this post is a bit all over the place but i am feeling all over the place at the moment .
Last week the man was saying how much he loves me and now he is as cold as ice .
He would contradict everything i said to him to the point of me even saying "look at how blue the sky is " and he would say something like " its not blue its light blue" Dose this ring any bells with people ?.
He would contradict himself in the space of a few sentancies almost as if he was doing it to confuse me .
His mother had him at 17 and she had a string of violent partners and he never knew his dad . could this have something to do with the condition or is it something you are born with ? and most importantly what do i do when if he comes back? which seems to be the patten .
Perutoo UK