Conflicted

15 posts / 0 new
Last post
#1 Sep 18 - 8AM
Rising Dawn
Rising Dawn's picture

Conflicted

I posted a couple of days ago that an ex-colleague and friend passed away suddenly last week, and exN took the opportunity to hoover me. I did not respond, but now that the service is planned for Wednesday, I am stressing about the situation.

I sincerely want to pay my respects to my friend and her family, but there is a good chance the exN and one of the OW (the one he was "in love with") will be there. We all worked together, so there will be many other ex-colleagues there as well.

I am feeling conflicted because I would like to attend, and there is expectation from other ex-colleagues I'll attend (but that's irrelevant, I know); but I am weary of putting myself in a situation where I might see exN. Honestly, if the OW was there and he wasn't, I would not care. I have nothing against her. He is the one I want to avoid, but the service is about my friend, so I don't want to allow him to impact my decision. Life is really funny sometimes.

I think I have mostly made up my mind to go, but I need to prepare myself. My friend who knows about him (but doesn't quite get the whole NPD thing) was understanding, but agreed that this is not about me or him; and if I get uncomfortable at the service, I can just leave, but I still should attend out of respect for my friend.

How have you dealt with a situation like this? I have not had contact in almost 5 months, and this is the last scenario in which I thought I might break NC.

Sep 19 - 9PM
Im_always_fine
Im_always_fine's picture

I would send an extremely

Sep 19 - 7AM
Used
Used's picture

rising dawn

Sep 19 - 7AM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

"WE WERE NOT EXTREMELY

Sep 19 - 7AM
Goldie
Goldie's picture

Now I am confused

Sep 19 - 12PM (Reply to #11)
Rising Dawn
Rising Dawn's picture

Well taken

Sep 18 - 11AM
Rising Dawn
Rising Dawn's picture

Clarification about the situation

Sep 18 - 12PM (Reply to #6)
Deidre99
Deidre99's picture

That's a good idea to run it

Sep 18 - 1PM (Reply to #7)
Rising Dawn
Rising Dawn's picture

Lots to consider

Sep 18 - 4PM (Reply to #8)
Deidre99
Deidre99's picture

I laughed at your last

Sep 19 - 7AM (Reply to #9)
Rising Dawn
Rising Dawn's picture

Still deciding...

Sep 18 - 10AM
femnarc
femnarc's picture

don't go

Sep 18 - 10AM
Deidre99
Deidre99's picture

I wouldn't hold it against a

Sep 18 - 8AM
round3
round3's picture

well.... recent "sighting"....

Sep 19 - 5PM (Reply to #2)
Walkingonsunshine
Walkingonsunshine's picture

I may say something that u