Does Ignoring Them Always Bother Them?
Does Ignoring Them Always Bother Them?
I posted this as a comment in another thread, "The Worst Punishment for the Narcissist," but would really appreciate some insight or opinions on these questions.
I've been NC for just over 6 weeks now. But the day it all finally went down it was very strange. He had given me the BIG D & D several weeks before, but we were still locked in
"the dance." There had been several attempts at NC during this time on my part. He would call or text and I would ignore it for a couple of days and finally give in and respond. There was fighting, me venting and getting things off my chest, trying to get closure, blah, blah, blah.
But the LAST day of contact, we actually had a fairly "decent" conversation (in comparison to others.) That night we were texting as follow-up to earlier in the day, and in true Narc fashion, he turned on me at one point and got nasty when I wasn't even attacking him. I was expressing my feelings and wasn't being negative or argumentative. But it deteriorated to the point that the last thing he wrote to me was, "Don't ever contact me again in any form. No calls, emails or texts." And that was that, except for the final text I sent him saying he was dead to me now and would never hear from me again. Neither one of us has made an attempt to contact the other.
SO. My questions are:
1. Since HE told ME not to contact him anymore, is he relieved I haven't?
2. Or was it a challenge because he didn't think I'd be able to resist trying in some way at some point?
3. Is he really affected by my NC with him like HE wanted? Is his ego bruised at all? Does he even notice?
4. Is he pissed because he lost control?
5. Does he even think of me (the supply I gave him and miss it?)
I would love to think I'm driving him crazy right now (realizing that it's just because he's frustrated, angered, whatever it is he feels when he doesn't get his way.)
He has ample supply right now with the new GF he gets to spend all his free time with, unlike what he had with me because I live on the other side of the country and couldn't see him very much. We DID talk on the phone every day for hours though and we were both very dependent on that interaction and he can't do that with the new GF because of the type of job she has. He's also getting a lot of supply from family and friends who are all "applauding" this new relationship.
Oddly enough, NC has been
I know that when I go NC or
The BIGGEST FEAR and narc has
This is really helpful to know.
Whether this applies to my
I have the same question kind
_______________________________________________
"dont let yesterday take up too much of today"
Rainbow
smitten kitten
Almost sounds like the same man
soaper girl
OWML
smittenkitten
OWML
When I broke contact before
"In the fiery pit lays a man with two faces.One is the face of a God and the other a face of the Devil.Beware He lurks your souls.Keep one hand on your heart and the other hand over your eyes. Let him walk pass you not into you.Ghost of love will possess
Ultimatum
kevsmart
Can't seem to manage NC (warning expletives used)
SoaperGirl
Ignoring Equivalents
Smitten Kitten
Staying Strong
And the answer is
He told ME not to contact HIM
This is exactly how I feel.
Smitten
They do not like to be
Strongerthanever
Hey Kitty
momoya
Momoya
I wouldn't be too sure of that, ladies.