ED

after years of forced anthropological study of the psychonarc, i'm quite confident he doesn't want to have sex with anyone... not for the SEX...it's all about manipulation and control...he just wants to see if he can manipualte someone into having sex with him..... or better yet...manipulate someone into betraying the current object of his hatred and rage... his first wife says he hit on everyone she ever knew...including her own mother!!...he tried that with my friends too...with no success...

couldn't get it up....couldn't keep it up..blamed on BOREDOM......

Could be because they can get it up with strangers....with no intimacy. They hate getting THAT close. No mess--no fuss. Mine preferred getting oral...or masterbating. I got some if he was feeling gratuitous, which wasn't very often.

Ok, I heard a N mention that he was getting "wobbly". Not being an expert on this subject, is this a predecessor to ED?

Yeah, I don't get it either and have been really perplexed about it. For instance, if they are in a relationship and can't have sex with their significant other, how do they get it up for a stranger? Mine had it the first time we were together and I think that he took Viagra to maintain an erection during the bonding process. BUT, any time we would just be kissing or hugging, he would immediately get an erection.

Who is Ed? ha ha I thought we had someone new and thought what a terrible name to have on this board, lol Seriously.... Talk about sexual fetishes, mine had so many, golden showers, wanted my leg, armpit and private hair LONG, (ish) wanted to see me with a strap on, (begged me to put one on) was obsessed with his junk like it was liquid gold. Typical they have to take any act of sexual activity and make it nasty, dirty its the only way they can get excited. I always had to talk dirty to mine, like a call girl, how about normal conversation once and awhile during sex like, you feel wonderful and I love you vs come, dick, p---y, F--k, pump, .... They made sex like such a difficult task, if you have to turn into a call girl to get your husband excited its not a healthy sign.

Fron my experiences with them, I think it boils down to only loving themselves and seeing others as objects. Masturbation is preferable because they can screw themselves, numero uno and don't have to worry about pleasing someone else. Even when they are with someone else, it's all about their needs. But specifically in terms of ED, I think they aren't attracted to someone for who they are (because we're just objects, you know) and objects typically don't turn someone on. However, my ex N had a few deeply ingrained fetishes and in order for him to NOT have ED, I had to comply with those fetishes. Then, he was turned on enough to last for a while. Without his fetishes present, limp city. And his fetishes were object fetishes (go figure). My Ex N had ED since his early 20s when he first attempted to become sexually active, so it was lifelong, not just something that presented itself at mid-life (which is common for men). And he was fully functional when he masturbated, so it was simply that another person didn't turn him on unless they catered to his fetishes (or allowed themselves to be completely objectified). I got sucked down the rabbit hole of catering to his fetishes with the false hope that if I did, we could have an intimate relationship (of course, he convinced me of this through control and manipulation). It wasn't long into it though that I realized he saw me as a mere fetish object and not as a person.