ggrrrrrr!!!!

Wow, you seem SO much stronger! Keep it up! :)

I'm glad you see what he's doing. Ignore him! You are done with him and deserve so much better!

Rainbow Your anger is obviously justified but if you just read your own story you can see how easy it is to get sucked in. he says one thing and it ends up into the same nonsense situation. and he trys to make light of his behavior "ha a lil older"....ok you loser! so basically you can do it many ways...like you no just go NC if you absolutely feel like you cant and must reveal what you know and expose him...then do it and get it over with. think about it, plan it, write down everything and then say it. But you have to institute your own time limit. the thing with keeping contact is that there is ALWAYS a new piece of information. And if youre in contact you want to rehash the whole thing again and again. the truth is no matter how many times you tell him hes a piece of crap. you will always want to ONE more time. its never enough. the best thing NC has done for me is literally give me the time to see it doesnt matter what i say. he wont change or feel bad. and what is my true intention in speaking...its obviously because i want some validation i mattered and him to feel remorse. when you realize thats not happening, you will see you are wasting your time. everyday i cuss him out...or have a discussion with him. its just in my head!! It isnt easy...but i know how easy it is to get suckered into their bs so i stay away.

Mine locked me out of the house I owned with him. Changed all the locks. The woman who followed me . . . took all the keys to her antique furniture after he locked the doors. Furniture cupboards & drawers locked . . . he had no idea where the keys were. And, just plain EVIL. I hope you have returned all his stuff? All this back & forth with stuff is a way to remain in contact. My ex-N kept stuff hostage for as long as possible so as to retain control & a means to contact. I think one just has to be willing to lose some stuff. Write possessions off & just be happy to have one's sanity.

Your mom needs to change the locks as well. He is lying and banking on the fact that you will fall for it. Everything they do is about control. Even the most subtle things. My baby nephew was a late walker. He was in physical therapy because they thought that perhaps something was off. When he started walking, my family and I were so happy and relieved. I hadn't seen the N for about a week and he came by my sisters to pick-up his paycheck. I was holding my nephew and told him how he had started to walk and I said, "Watch! It's so awesome!". You know what he said? "Oh!It's okay, I'll have plenty of time to see it". I was so hurt and it was very subtle, but it was his way of controlling the situation because he knew that it was important to me and he wanted to take the joy out of that moment. The ultimate control FREAKS!