Goodbye Douchbag

Goodbye and good riddance.
Good riddance to all your lies.
Don't miss you getting up and sitting on the john the whole time I would be getting ready for work so I would have to leave without using the washroom.
Don't miss setting a book down and then not being able to read it because you were.
Don't miss you dumping the groceries on the floor and escaping to the john until everything was put away.
Don't miss you going to parties and fishing and going to bike events and any other event while I was cutting the grass and painting.
Good riddance, you are replaceable just like I am. I don't have to drive on bald tires now. I have a block heater in the car now, even though you said there was no room. Thanks for sabotaging my car hoping I would die, it's fixed and I didn't die.
You told me what to wear, I can wear what I want now. I wasn't suppose to wear spagetti straps because it supposedly made my ass look bigger than my shoulders. I saw a picture of your new girlfriend in spagetti straps, she's about 170 lbs and fat is hanging out everywhere. I'm 90 lbs. So have a good look at her ass, I wear a size 1. You can't make me feel bad about myself anymore. I laugh at you now.
I don't have to clean the living room every morning because there are no crumbs in there from you grazing all night in front of the tv.
I don't have to worry about the cops showing up to haul you away and throw you in jail anymore. In fact if it happens I'll laugh cause you aren't my problem anymore.
And please feel free to chew some more drugs, the more the better.
I am making friends, something I couldn't do when you were here.
You no longer ruin Christmas by being an arguementive, know it all asshole at the supper table.
I no longer have to watch you kick doors, punch vehicles, swear, throw power tools, lawnmowers or anything else.
I no longer have to put up with you being the absolute center of attention at all times.
I don't have to put up with your drug addicted friends.
Goodbye and good riddance you brain damaged f-------!