How many of you were dumped and NEVER contacted again?

My exN has not contacted me. It's been almost 3 months since the D &D and 2 1/2 since I moved out. Two weeks after I moved, he sent me a two line email asking how I was doing. Then a week later he called me demanding I pay part of the cell bill, which I didn't. Since then, nothing. That was back in March. My exN always said he never chases anyone. That's only partially true, since he 100% chased and pursued me when we were first dating. But I don't expect to hear from him again. I've been NC, I have no desire to text/call. I don't care if I never see him again. He lives in a different city, and while we are from the same hometown, I don't expect to run into him here at home anytime soon. I'm 99% sure my exN is gone for good, and that's a good thing!

I could have only been so lucky. Nope, every last one of them always came back to torture me some more. I had the pot head showing up for years until I D&D him so badly one day THAT curbed his appetite for a return visit. He actually got down on his hands and knees one day begging for me to take him back and professing his undying love for me whimpering like a little puppy dog. It was all I could do not to start laughing in his face. Then there was my son's father who came back for a repeat performance when he was in dire need of money. He did not get any though. Then there was the one with aspergers syndrome. He showed up again for years. What part of I don't want you in my life DON'T you get!!! Then of course the last one oxyboy. He was the worst. Came back over and over again. Do I have cash cow written on my forehead??? Or perhaps maggot magnet??? Whatever it is or was I am ready to LET GO of the ties which bind. I'm all set. Some think it is a blessing if they never come back and actually aside from the "brief" rush you get when they beg, the rest of it is just more of the same. Same shit different day!!! Welcome to my nightmare. So I guess I would prefer that they never came back. They all claim that it is because I am so unforgettable. I think it was more that I was a soft touch and actually listened to their bullshit. You can't give them and inch or they will take a mile. God bless, Goldie

Mine is a huge coward so with a bit of luck he will not hoover... He try to do it a bit by proxy in the beginning but I did not take the bait and went NC straight away.... But then again I dumped him and forbade him at that point to make any contact. When I went to the "hoovering" meeting my mind was already made up that I had had enough of his stupid behaviour. I had all his gifts in a bag ready to be returned and I had already blocked him on FB and email and deleted him from my phone....so it was unequivocal at that point.... I am fairly sure that it will be at least 10 years before he comes anywhere near me again.... Plenty of time to heal then.... suits me fine :-)

My exN Husband of 13 yrs repeatedly left for other women and always comes crawling back about 2 months later. Actually, now that I think about it, it is when I let go (don't call him, get busy, not even around when he picks up kids for a visit, don't ope or return emails etc.) THAT's when he re-enters. Oh I am inferior to him, and he doesn't want to take care of me/us, but he doesn't want someone else to have me either. Always paranoid about me being with another man, and I believe it is because he knows he controlled me with sex (it was good and never abused me in that way), and he doesn't want to give up the control. At any rate, when I discovered the sexting in his deleted text folder, and one of the OW informed me he NEVER had a wedding ring on at work (was taking it off as soon as he left in morning) I took him to counseling and of course he said I was Bi-polar and he had no issues. (Sooo typical.) I did get a "sorry" that was it. I decided that this pattern of abandonment/crawling back would continue and kicked him out. He has tried a number of tactics to come back, but no different than others on this site.

Xnh dumped me. However, it's GETTING him to disappear that's my problem. Oh, how I wish he would completely forget about me! He's harassed me for an entire year (both at home and at work) after he told me he didn't love me or want to be married to me any longer. For someone that told me how I was "holding him back from living the life he 'deserves'", xnh certainly is a real Klingon. I can't seem to shake him completely off my a*s, no matter how hard I try. He's a real sticky turd. lol.

My ex-narc just disappeared. We spoke on the phone one night, I asked him to call me the next evening, he gave me a terse 'okay', his phone then accidentally butt-dialed me, I called him back, he said bye...and that was over two months ago. After three weeks of calling and texting him everyday, I finally deleted my e-mail address and blocked his phone number. I am currently working on getting closure without ever really getting closure. The best way to get revenge on the fact that they "never think about us"? Never think about them!

Didn't even have the pleasure of being dumped. He just decided to stop talking to me. He put some cryptic stuff on facebook but whether that was about our situation or not - who knows?! I tried to contact him once but no response. Sadly we have to see each other but other than a forced ' Hello' he has never spoken to me. He has kind of hoovered as in talking to my friends, parking car outside my house or kind of waiting for me but then walking on when I catch up. Very strange.I think if I had been properly dumped it would have been easier to get over. Instead it was like I wasn't even worthy enough to be dumped!

Your story is so similiar to mine. I knew mine young. He was only the 2nd guy I had ever had sex with. I too am married. Mine completely went silent on me and when he broke it it was to tell me he was gettin married. I don't think he is as I just read an article about his new business (which he got the idea when he was with me) anyway he referred to the ow as his gf not fiance gf and said meeting her was a life changing event. Those the exact words I told him that my husband said when he met me. They really are such copiers. After a couple of my friends read that article both said without a doubt that their comments made directed at me to make me insane with jealousy I mean this guy was on match.com in late september and he is opening a new business and engaged by march and the time frames in the article indicated he was with her while sending me I love you texts and I coming in novembr for a week to see u. If she's marrying him, I feel sorry for her. My point is here is an example they don't change because they CAN'T. This is what they are wired to do. It isn't personal. As long as I have known this guy he has picked a gf based on what she could do for him. Myself included. He's gone now as I have nothing to offer him. I live in a different city and we are in different lines of work and there is no way he can really benefit from an aliance w me. I'm way too much work with nothing to offer. So the pay off isn't there. I suspect that is the case with you. Now everytime I have thoughts of him I stop and say gettinbetter he is a psychopath! He just is. I can't deny it anymore. He is and I tell myself over and over. I don't care if he gets married. He is still a psychopath meeting the right woman at age 44 is not going to cure his psychopathy it won't. It just means he has found someone gullible enough to stick around for his abuse and allow him to appear normal. Pg I feel bad for you it sucks but the answer is yes they can dump you go on and never contact you again. They can do that because they don't attach to ANYONE. THEY ARE PSYCOPATHS. They have an outta sight outta mind way of thinking. You are maarried with children you are way too much work for him. Today I feel thankful he's not contacting me om finally working my way out of the vortex and you will too

Your story is so similiar to mine. I knew mine young. He was only the 2nd guy I had ever had sex with. I too am married. Mine completely went silent on me and when he broke it it was to tell me he was gettin married. I don't think he is as I just read an article about his new business (which he got the idea when he was with me) anyway he referred to the ow as his gf not fiance gf and said meeting her was a life changing event. Those the exact words I told him that my husband said when he met me. They really are such copiers. After a couple of my friends read that article both said without a doubt that their comments made directed at me to make me insane with jealousy I mean this guy was on match.com in late september and he is opening a new business and engaged by march and the time frames in the article indicated he was with her while sending me I love you texts and I coming in novembr for a week to see u. If she's marrying him, I feel sorry for her. My point is here is an example they don't change because they CAN'T. This is what they are wired to do. It isn't personal. As long as I have known this guy he has picked a gf based on what she could do for him. Myself included. He's gone now as I have nothing to offer him. I live in a different city and we are in different lines of work and there is no way he can really benefit from an aliance w me. I'm way too much work with nothing to offer. So the pay off isn't there. I suspect that is the case with you. Now everytime I have thoughts of him I stop and say gettinbetter he is a psychopath! He just is. I can't deny it anymore. He is and I tell myself over and over. I don't care if he gets married. He is still a psychopath meeting the right woman at age 44 is not going to cure his psychopathy it won't. It just means he has found someone gullible enough to stick around for his abuse and allow him to appear normal. Pg I feel bad for you it sucks but the answer is yes they can dump you go on and never contact you again. They can do that because they don't attach to ANYONE. THEY ARE PSYCOPATHS. They have an outta sight outta mind way of thinking. You are maarried with children you are way too much work for him. Today I feel thankful he's not contacting me om finally working my way out of the vortex and you will too

I left NM without telling anyone. Only my roommate knew. I didn't tell any of my classmates who were still in town... my friend in Colorado knew, but she was in Colorado. I didn't tell any of the professors I trusted, for fear it would get around. I've broken NC several times, but the ex-Psych prof has NEVER responded. Maybe his colleagues (who apparently had been calling him out on his bad behavior) or his parents (WHO LIVE WITH HIM) are the reasons why. And, of course, the ex-P is probably afraid of being used as an object of ridicule. He is a form of supply for comic fodder, NOT a man!

Scoop posted " The Silent Treatment" read it. Silence = Peace, trust me! They never go away 100% Hunter

I was lied to by a married man and then he just - pooof- disappeared and we never spoke again. He couldn't face me it seems but really was just a lying cheater.

dumped so many times i lost count and then he came back after a few months or so, and finally dumped me and moved away when we had been talking about moving together,all because i actually asked for equal treatment, the nerve of ME!!!

who dumped who. It's the most confusing breakup I ever had. He was being abusive and disrespectful, kept playing games withholding affection, then acting like we were together. He would breakup in the past as a way of controlling. I left, but the last week I was there he kept calling, so I guess he was hoovering. I don’t think he'll ever call me again. He knows I know who he is, as I was calling him out, said he was an abuser, a narcissist, a womanizer, and a misogynist (had to explain it). He then threw me under the bus with his character assassination of me, saying I was crazy, a liar, a nutjob, a whore, b*tch, c--t. I think he knows better than to ever contact me. I am all too happy NEVER to hear from him again. I think he'll remember me in some messed up narc fashion. I don't care what he thinks or says. It's all just rantings from a narc. I said things in self-defense. If he tries to convince his family with his lies, and they believe him, it just speaks volumes about them for not seeing the truth, and probably the reason he is a N to begin with. Best to you. ((Hugs))

I was dumped and never contacted again, never hoovered. Yes to know that i am completely forgotten, never thought of (unless it's to say something negative about me to someone)is beyond words for me. I share your grief.

Only 6 weeks after his move, then only responded by text for 4 months, never spoke to me about breaking up, then posted a pic of him and new GF on FB and never texted or spoke to me again. I broke contact in March after 4 months of silence. He was very sad and extremely ashamed, but never apologized or ever contacted me again. I broke contact a few more pitiful times and he ignored it. He has a history of abandoning women after really bad things happen, he runs and never speaks to them again (he told me no old GF will ever speak to him again). the only difference with me is there was no problem between us before the move, but my understanding is that he can not face a woman after he behaves badly (wrecks their car, gets them pregnant, lies and runs off) because it deeply hurts his image of himself as a nice guy. Also, he has endless supply of new women (tall, charming ex-celeb) so he does not need the trouble of revisiting old supply and having to go through all that emotional turmoil of mending the past misdeeds. He is totally insulated from the normal consequences most people have to face, although one baby momma socked it to him and exposed him publicly years ago - but he did not change at all, just waited out the rough time to continue doing the same hurtful behaviors. The only change is that he stopped making babies...They really can block us out with booze, image seeking, new sex etc. They probably have little twinges here and there when something reminds them of us but I am sure they shake it off and do not dwell. Mine sounded totally devastated when we spoke so he does at least "get" that he did something bad. But I think they are only hurt for themselves...you know like when a kid is sad for being bad because he is going to get spanked for it - no depth...no real compassion...sorry for your hurt. They are freaky.

NEVER FEAR, N's never forget..he is just getting his NS elsewhere at the moment. When that supply dries up, he will be by to reuse and recycle you. He already knows you are easy easy prey, because you contact him, you leave him access to your profile, and HE knows you care. Trust me, when I kicked my husband to the curb, My ExN looked up every OW he cheated on me previously with (although I did a pretty good job burning bridges with many of them- proud of myself making him have to work that much harder to access NS) So if you can't wait to be reused and recycled again keep at it. But, I think you may want to love yourself a little more, forget that loser, or you might end up like me 13 years of marriage and two kids later and N is worse in behavior than when I met him. Do you want to end up middleaged and bitter like me? I didn't think so. Block the pathetic ASS, never contact him again. He WAS NOT the love of your life. Never will be the love of anyones life. Get in touch with your anger for the time and love he took from you under false prestenses and take up kick boxing

It's going on 2 yrs since I heard from him. However last June is when I caught him driving by my house. I seriously doubt it was the first time. Don't think he has the balls to ever contact me and I pray he never does...and stops driving by my house when he isn't with his wife or son.