The more I think about it..

Its so crazy for me these last few days. As I think of all the crap i went through with my N it actualy makes me think to myself, why didnt I see all this disfunction before now? I know I was in a fog and completely in love with a total NARC but I would have never let myself go that low for anyone! I have been really thinking of all the dysfunction that was in my relationship. I met his mom probably 2 months into the relationship..She says I was a Breath of fresh air. She did not like my narcs wife at all! She would always text me and we kept in touch the whole year and a half we were together. People would say what is wrong with her thats not normal for a mother in law to do that!..After A while she would see the games he would play with me and his wife. He lived with his mom and dad so she would see me leave his house then his wife would come over cook him dinner get laid and he would send her back to her sisters, this went on for about 6 months. His mom always told me it was a revolving door with her and I. When she would confront him he would tell her "they are both adults they know whats going on if there ok with it why shouldnt I be"..She finally began telling me to RUN as fast as I can away from this situation that things with him will NEVER change. She told me I deserved better and i was a good person who should never have to deal with this crap!! She could see it in her own son..Why couldnt I see it. I guess towards the end I just couldnt take it anymore and opened my eyes to what I was truly accepting as a relationship and thats when I ended it. She would tell me No NORMAL person would stay and take this crap from another human being! I cut off all contact with her since my NC with the NARC its kinda hard but talking to her just gave me the inside info that just HURT me I couldnt live through them anymore. I guess the question I keep going over in my head is WHAT THE HELL was I thinking...Im sad I wasted all that time with someone who never will and never did care about me....what Dysfunction i was in!! To think this is just a little bit of it....there was soo much more!

Just thinking out loud....Thanks for listening

justme