Moving to another State , wish me luck!

Your move sounds wonderful! Sorry I've been so out of touch...been overwhelmed (see my most recent post). Sending hugs of congratulations your way, Leah

How exciting for you!

Oh dear, you MUST get internet. You must gather up every avenue of keeping your connections as possible. Moving to a new area is very exciting, and the excitement is as much fear as it is anticipating good stuff :) This is my personal opinion, but I believe if I myself am in good relationship with ME, I could live anywhere. I have lived in big cities (Seattle and San Diego) and have lived in the absolute sticks (North Idaho town, population 350 up an 8 mile switchback grade on a mountain top). And, I managed to make my way in BOTH. What I PREFER, after these experiences, is to live on a few acres just outside a decent sized city where I can go to the Mall or find a good Indian restaraunt :D and then drive twenty minutes to go home and be surrounded by country and that lifestyle. What I mean to say is, that I doubt you can make a huge mistake in moving somewhere else, as if somehow it will be cosmically WRONG. I truly believe you have most of the control over your experience, here. So go for it!! If I were to go into a new area, the first thing I would do is find some immediate connections with other people. As it is, moving to a new area will be isolating, that is a given. So, ameliorate the isolation by taking direct action against it. Sign up for a class right away, even a free adult class at a junior college or community center. Seriously. Being new to the area will attract lots of people to you (hopefully mostly decent ones :D ) who want to tell you the best market, the best restaurants, what areas to avoid for the traffic, etc. Do something that gets you out of your house and out of the inevitable miasma that moving to a new area will bring. At least to fend it off, a bit. Nothing changes until something changes. You are making a huge, brave change. Your responsibility to yourself, now, is to take measures to ensure your success, your ease of transition. You know it won't be easy (thus, your natural fears) so DO something to allay those fears. You won't get rid of them entirely, but you can keep them from paralyzing you. I have had to do TOO MUCH moving in the last ten years :( I moved from San Diego and it's million plus population to North Idaho and it's complete LACK of people and then three more moves over the last three years that have slowly moved me back to a place I can say now is just right. Each time I had to scrabble for my footing again. I got a little bit better at it each time. I do NOT want to do it again, God please. But maybe my direct experience can help you a bit :) ((((hugs)))))

I wish you all the best for this move. This is sometimes just what the doctor ordered. A change of scenery. A fresh start. I believe you have the inner strength to stay away from the Narc. All of the ladies here do, if you want to tap into that and truly do something healthy for yourself. I had to move from CA to WA State to "get away" from all the triggers, memories, and stressing out about running into him (even though I did a good job of avoiding him, wanted nothing to do with him or OW). It was the best thing for me, and it sounds like it could be the best thing for you, too. Yes, life is an adventure, it shouldn't feel like a prison sentence after the abuse. And if you are single and free, why the heck not?!?! GOOD LUCK TO YOU.

awww..good luck!

Woohoo onwithmylife I feel good vibes for you about this! Hopefully the town you are moving to is nowhere near the narc. I am so thankful he lives six hours from as if he lived close I would surely have lost my marriage and my mind

BE CAREFUL, I moved also last August near where my psycho lived and ya you can guess what happened? Just be careful you will know in your mind he lives close. You know how bad I wanted to spy on him? To see first hand what the woman he lives with looks like? I NEVER DID, I stayed far away clear across town. It was ridiculous, who CARES what she looks like or what she is like she is just another poor victim with a good heart I am sure. Just be careful honey!!!!! I wish you well and a great new start.

I think this is a really cool and a really brave thing to do! I admire your strength and courage. I'm going to be out of town from the 10th-16th, but I'd love to get together again before you go! Maybe Lynn can meet us too. Maybe lunch on the weekend? I'm free all this weekend. Having met you, I can totally see you in that state. I think where you are now is so phony and well, just crazy, you seem out of place. You are a much more simple, easy going, laid back person and you aren't worried about your image and deeping up with the Jonses. You're going to do great up there!