My Story 2manyofthem
My Story 2manyofthem
I am new to this site..
Like the rest of you, I have been used and destroyed by a narcissist/psychopath..
To try and make a long story short..my father was a sociopath as was my first husband..both the criminal type and i thought i knew the signs twenty five years ago after i somehow got through it on my own..it was a different world then and there wasn't much awareness..
However, it has happened to me again, largely because i had associated these people with crime, or low level crime at least...
this time it was an optometrist..nice house, well spoken, community volunteer, etc..eveyone seems to adore..
idealize, devalue all happened to me, but i still did not realize what it was..i knew it was something, should have known but did not twig..
in his case, it was all leading up to this bondage slave master sex scenario..once i consented to my own emotional rape, the discard came and i finally got it..
i stupidly confronted him, and told him i was going to report him to stop his using his profession to groom and hurt women..
of course he won..he deleted all my texts which was my proof of his hypnosis sexual slave bondage weirdness that night as i slept and the next morning told police i had beat him up and verbally abused him..
after the shock of what he had done, i was still in ptsd and actually did verbally abuse him..he used the fifteen letters of a damaged victim to convince a judge and get a restraining order..good grief..like the wolf getting protection from the lamb..
that was only a few weeks ago..
i got into therapy, but realize i have a long road ahead..i have a lot of anger, though i think i am past the stage where i miss him..hard to believe you can miss satan..
it's hard people cannot see what he is, but i would never hear a word against him for most of the relationship, so i cannot blame them..he's very good at what he does..
a boyish face, and eager to please them all...
i am struggling mostly of the fact of my own stupidity, and for not turning him in when i first realized things, but no,i stupidly told the enemy of my plans..
it's just all devastating, and it is good to find this blog and places for help, as the world seems largely in the dark over what is a very real and serious problem..
i live in australia, though i am american..i love it here, but i have to say there is less awareness and less help here than there would be in america..
peace and love to you all..i don't know a group of people who could use some more than we do..xx