PTSD triggering event

9 posts / 0 new

#1 Sep 6 - 11AM

GhostBuster

PTSD triggering event

Is this normal with PTSD? I've been doing pretty well with it for a few months (8 months out of N relationship), but I had what I think was a triggering event yesterday and am still feeling a lot of anxiety from it. And it has NOTHING to do with my ex N. The event was spending time with my cousin's girlfriend (we had what I thought was going to be a fun girls day and then overnight at my house Friday). She showed up at my place completely wasted (alcohol), proceeded to drink the rest of the night (we didn't do any of the fun girls day we had planned, as a result), and then the next morning, she downed 9 drinks in an hour...so she was wasted again. I'm not a prude, but it freaked me out. She just kept grabbing me and saying "hey, what's your problem? Are you a serious person or something?"...and then she'd stumble around, trip over my dog, or grab the phone and drunk dial someone. There was no reasoning with her or getting her to calm down or sober up. I finally got fed up and took her home the next day...but that was after a full 24 hours with her in this state. I'm not really sure why, but this traumatized me and triggered the PTSD. I'm still panic pacing, blurred vision, anxiety pains in the chest, etc. I guess I feel violated or disregarded maybe by her behavior. But I'm also conflicted because I'm pretty sure her father is a N and also a physical abuser (he used to beat she and her mother). I know she has a lot of unresolved issues from her family situation and a lot of problems in relationships and life in general. But it was kind of like watching someone trying to kill themselves with booze...like that movie Leaving Las Vegas. I think I can't be around her anymore but that feels heartless, given all her problems.

Does this kind of thing happen when you are recovering from PTSD? Do you have anxiety reactions to people violating/disregarding you? Or people in extreme self-destruction mode? Do you have to remove those people from your life?

#2 Sep 6 - 10PM

James (not verified)

Good question

Does this kind of thing happen when you are recovering from PTSD? Interesting question... For me the answer would be yes and in fact itâ€™s very hard for me to be around any person who show strong traits of being dysfunctional. I now not suffering from PTSD (well not as much) symptoms. I believe I still suffer from some EM (emotional memory) and if something happen that sparks or reminds me of my ex more with a person I meet it does fill me with negative feelings. But still if anyone is lying to me, that really get my blood boiling like never before in my life. I just simply canâ€™t stand a liar and if I feel someone is lying to me I would bring it to their attention ASAP! Before I was always more sympathetic with a liar and try to understand why they lie to me. No more!!! Lie to me just once and if you donâ€™t have a very good (like there is ever a good one) reason that will be the last time because I walking away and walking quickly from this person. http://james-personalitydisorder.blogspot.com/

#3 Sep 6 - 3PM

Barbara (not verified)

GhostBuster - PTSD questions

Does this kind of thing happen when you are recovering from PTSD? YES... as time goes on it will happen less & less though Do you have anxiety reactions to people violating/disregarding you? Or people in extreme self-destruction mode? YES!!!! Do you have to remove those people from your life? YES!!!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck

#4 Sep 6 - 2PM

Petey (not verified)

Is anyone online. I need to

Is anyone online. I need to talk.

#5 Sep 6 - 2PM (Reply to #6)

Barbara (not verified)

Petey

there is no live chat here post your questions - someone will answer. Read thru ALL the pages on MESSAGE BOARD and ALL the posts on MY BLOG - I'd bet a lot of your questions have been asked & answered already. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck

#6 Sep 6 - 12PM

quietude (not verified)

ptsd

Wow ghostbuster, how terrible! I have not had anything to that level, but I can imagine having a person displaying pronounced toxic behavior around you can most certainly trigger a bad reaction! Is there someone you know who could talk to her? She sounds like she is on the fast-track to self destruction. It's sad...but maybe you shouldn't be the one trying to help her at this time due to what you are personally experiencing. I'm sorry you had to go by this. I can say that yes, on the smaller scale where I've encountered someone who I now perceive as a 'threat' to my well-being, I block them out...unless it's not possible, then working around or ignoring them. If I could turn my back, so to speak, on the man I loved in the name of "no more abuse", I can certainly can try my best to do so with other unhealthy people.

#7 Sep 6 - 1PM (Reply to #2)

neveragain

Very Alarming Behavior

That situation, where someone is acting erratic, out of control and invasive is exactly what it feels like being around a Narcissist. That girl was so intoxicated, she was the center of attention. THAT's also a very Narcissistic quality. Think about it. You didn't do anything you'd had planned because of HER. You had to basically "babysit" her because she was so impaired. Isn't that what we do when we're in a relationship with an N? I'm sorry, but the dynamics seem so similar, NO WONDER you had anxiety and were so upset. You have every right to stay away from someone who is going down the tubes. Unless you're a trained counselor, her behavior could drag you down with her. You can care about her, but you can't care FOR her. I'd say my prayers for her and hope that someone who can intervene, will. You are a caring person but you can't stop this girl from self-destructing. If you try, you might end up in a big mess. You certainy don't need that right now!! Hugs, neveragain

#8 Sep 6 - 5PM (Reply to #3)

GhostBuster

Thanks everyone

Thanks for all your input. I guess I knew the answers to my questions, it just feels like I'd be abandoning her in her time of need. And it's such a lousy feeling. But I know (in my gut) that she'd pull me down from my recovery. Honestly, I don't know that anyone will get through to her. She's stuck in the muck...so deep. I lent her Lisa's book (because she's too broke to buy a copy) and told her about this website, but she's not very willing to confront the narcissism in her life (and like you said NeverAgain...her own N behavior under the influence). She was very horrible to me and I can't let her do that again. It was so sad to hear her talk to her N father on the phone (drunk dialing)...she was trying so desperately to connect with him. She informed him that her birthday is next week and you know what he did? He blew it off and told her about something he would like to receive as a gift from her. She told him she'd get it for him. So sickeningly twisted. Thanks for pulling me back from major PTSD mode. It's getting a bit better now.

#9 Sep 6 - 7PM (Reply to #4)

Barbara (not verified)

Adult Children of Narcissists

A book for an ACON is CHILDREN OF THE SELF-ABSORBED by Nina Brown. I also made a post about "Abusive Narcissistic Parents" today with the address of a Yahoo Group just for ACONS. She should take advantage. ACON = Adult Children of Narcissists ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck

Path Forward Buy Now Reviews
All About Her Buy Now Reviews
All About Him Buy Now Reviews