Red Flag Warnings.
Red Flag Warnings.
Hi everyone,
I have just read a post from Jen where she said what her red flag warnings were (warning signs that she wished she had not ignored).
http://www.lisaescott.com/forum/2011/05/06/red-flags-i-ignored
It certainly helps me to know that I was not alone in being in denial about some of my N's bad points. I think in the early days I did not want to see them because I wanted to believe that he was my Prince Charming.
I found Jen's post really useful and would like to share my N's red flag warnings and also know what other people's were. I find it really helpful when I hear other people describe how their N's behaved and it is similar to how mine was. It reminds me that I'm definately right in thinking that he is a narcissist (gives me a sanity check).
Here are my N's Top 10:
1) He was rude and hostile to his mum and she behaved as if that was normal.
2) He was always unsymapathetic whenever I was ill and refused to help me get to a doctor. (Except on the oneoccasion that I needed emergency contraception!).
3) The family pet dog was attacked by burglars who got into his parents's house but all he cared about was that they had taken his CD's. He was angry with the dog for not protecting his property.
4) He disliked all of his ex-girlfriends and told me I was a much better catch than them.
5) Six months into the relationship he said "I want to be engaged to you by Xmas". Xmas came and went. It never happened.
6) If I dared to challenge him about something that he had done which had really hurt me I would always end up apologising to him and feeling like it was all my fault.
7) He regualarly arranged to phone me on certain days/times and then didn't keep to it but never offered an explanation. If I asked for one he reacted as if I was needy and possesive and would make me feel guilty for asking him to explain.
8) I once asked him if he would read a self-help guide for improving relationships in an attempt to improve our relationship. He reacted VERY BADLY to this suggestion.
9) He would be different around other people to how he was with me (e.g. moody with me but friendly to other people on the same night out). He would be moody with me when we were on our own or with his friends, but nice to me in front of my friends and family.
10) He always had to be the one to decide when we would meet, where we would meet and what we would be doing.
Everyone, please tell me your red flag warnings.
Carol
xxx
Red Flags
Yes!
Carol24
While reading through these,
Believe in yourself!
Terri
#2 made me laugh, how you
I know...
He had four ex wives, and
Mine was similar.
red flags
Ifinallygotit
Red Flags
Alibi
- Had a dysfunctional
Carol24
Believe in yourself!
Terri
Thanks Terri.
The biggest red flag should
Nan
I was exhausted too.
Carol, I listed a few on the
spinning
Thankyou!
SPINNING
used, they did give
spinning