Self Contempt

Hi All. I am struggling and thought I'd post to share and get some feedback. I thought I was doing so well. I thought I was over him and the abuse he put me through. I felt I was setting boundaries and moving on in a positive direction. Them BAM! I hit a wall...I started on this path of self destruction. My attitude went south, I was treating people who were kind to me poorly. It is as if I am soooo convinced I am unworthy I have to prove it to everybody else.

Now I am embarrased and sorry and have no shoulder to lean on. I am again alone and full of self loathing. I am a good person. Is it just that I'm scared to let myself be kind again, as a self protection mechanism? I am so sad, I don't know why I am acting the way I have been. It's almost as if I've turned into him. Has anybody else experienced this? Is this a normal part of the process?

BtrflyGrl