Waiting w Flowers
Waiting w Flowers
Hi
I went out with a new guy friend last night , simple easy dinner and a movie to see Super 8, which was loud but good. (The child actors carried that movie!) We had good conversation it was nice to go out. I had butter on my popcorn too!
I got home around 11pm. I drove my own car and so I was by myself.
Ex was on my steps with flowers waiting for me. I could of drove off and left but I didn't. I sat down next to him on the steps and he told me right off the bat that he was sober and had not been drinking. He got up and handed the flowers to me I just sighed and looked at him.
He told me I looked nice and did I go out? I told him I had been out with a friend to see a movie nothing major. He proceeded to apologize for 'being out of control so much lately' and that he had been a 'mess of himself' and apologized for being mean and all he did around the therapy session. He said to me 'GOD Here I had this chance with you right in front of me , and I just had to squeeze all the life of that too." Interesting choice of words there.
I told him thanks for saying it and that he really didn't need to keep bringing flowers anymore and that I couldn't keep them, it was too much to have to smell them or look at them in a vase in my house, and it was hard for me too still. He said it was going to be hard for him for a long time, but that he sees now that I am not going to take him back. I told him that I didn't want him to be angry with me anymore for any thing and he said he really wasn't he just is angry that he was so stupid to fuck it all up.
I handed him the flowers back and told him I was going inside.
I wanted to cry. I wanted to slide on to his lap and hug him close.
I didn't do any thing. But he could see it in my eye I think.
He asked me to please let him come inside w me. He looked at me and said 'I never feel as good as I do with you, right now with you, nothing makes me this way". I told him I wish I could but that he has this way of pushing it so that I feel pressured to give him more and more, and that if he came in he may sit in the living room but we both knew that he was going to move me to the bedroom.
He just lowered his head, so defeated and sad.
He told me he was sorry again, he will always love me and got up and left without me asking him to leave or me walking away 1st. He just got up and walked away and didn't even look back at me. For this brief moment I felt a feeling of being abandoned by him (I don't understand that feeling) but, the way he just walked off head low, and it felt so strange and sad for me
maybe, we have turned a corner.
When my ex-N looked defeated and sad...
BADA
yes
In my estimation the
He's just trying a new angle
Littleone nailed it here,
______________________________________________________
God sometimes removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.
@ Myst
bada, sweet, braveheart, I'm going to
spinning
thank u spinning
spinning
You are so strong Bada, don't
Journey on...
thank u Journey
It IS strength Bada... your
Journey on...
Wow, bedabing.....I don think
@Smarter
I told mine to go to therapy
you did good
being nice
Maybe WE(???) have turned a corner
thanks 58
Feelings
@58&GS
Good outcome
lump in my throat
You have made a little more
@ Dazed
Bada
yes I will cry
I understand this completely.
Wow Reddley