What do you think YOU were used for?

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#1 Mar 28 - 7PM
Anonymous (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

What do you think YOU were used for?

I am just full of "New Forums" arent I?

Thanks for all the responses of those who shared their involvement in their perversion, I should say what they wanted you to do. Strange how we keep narrowing down little by little the purpose they had for us. I can narrow down what his agenda was for me, summing it up he wanted me to be a porn star in his little sick world. When I look back I was tested, trained and fine tuned, much like a pimp would do for his call girls. Talk about premeditative manslaughter of another human beings soul.

I dont believe many of them know the chemical breakdown of forming a sexual bond with their victims, like Barbara said, they do what works for them by trial and error. However, I DO believe they plot and plan and are constantly calculating how to keep, control and manipulate their victims. That is why they are always one step ahead and it has been said you can never win with them, the only way to win is to disengage and go NC. I never imagined in my life I would be a victim of sexual abuse, especially in the manner in which this man operated. I think it was very therapeutic for me to watch a few of the porno clips of group encounters, because that is EXACTLY what mine was trying to achieve from me, maybe thats why I threw up today. As I was so deeply under his spell and in love with him he was doing this and was pretending how much he missed me and what I meant to him. Ya I can see how much he missed me, just pull up a porn group site and it will show the love he had for me.

I am not shocked anymore after putting this forum up for discussion. It has shown me the true sexual predator that he was. Ladies, God love ya for sharing things that were shameful to you, and not being afraid of being judged for becoming a victim of a pathological predator. You all have my respect. Barbara I will say what you once said, Sometimes I am still shocked and maybe always will be from the man he was in the beginning to how he tried to destroy me in the end. He made me feel like I missed my true calling in life, To be a porn star, that is the only use he had for me. Guess when you are bent over with your private parts ready for engagement your personal good qualities are of little importance, I struggled with that for sooo long wanting him to see me as a fine human being, no wonder he never cared to hear me play the piano, ha ha ha. More importantly no wonder we are left trying to pick up the pieces of our life we lost.

If you had to summarize looking back what do each of you think his purpose was for you? Laundry, meals, front? I wont say sex because that is just really a tool they use it seems to lure us and bond.

Apr 2 - 4PM
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

missing posters....

i wish i'd made a digital picture of his big nasty swollen testicle...i've even thought of downloading one from a medical website and making some MISSING posters..with his name....in ALL CAPS of course... HAVE YOU SEE THIS MAN?.. MISSING!! MIKE..(YOU ALL KNOW THE LAST NAME) IDENTIFYING FEATURES.... (PHOTO OF THE BIG GIANT TESTICLE) wonder how he'd like THAT???...go into papa johns and ask if they'd mind if i put up a missing monster flyer...and tape THAT to their front window......
Apr 2 - 1PM
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

pizza delivery......

everyone really should pay more attention to what delivers your food..could be a drunk..a pervert...a convicted felon...the psychonarc's boyfriend was on probation..wasn't supposed to be canoodling with other felons...so i tattled him out..i've done everything i can think of to screw with the psycho...without getting near him..and without him knowing about it......when i was sitting the in the probation office waiting to talk to his boyfriend's PO.....i saw a spiral notebook sitting on a table...it was full of companies who HIRE convcited felons...and there were lots of them...wish now i'd swiped the damn thing....that would have made for some good reading and blogging...i think ADT got sued over that...hiring convicted felons to install alarm systems......
Apr 2 - 9AM
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture


wanna talk about some Karma...this is gross but i'm sure some of you will get a kick out of it...the psychonarc's penis was nothing special..at all...but he sure thought it was...and i'd posted before how he withheld sex for YEARS...well...the bastard developed a hydrocele...one his testicles was continually filling with some kind of icky fluid...and it would get HUGE..completley obscuring his little dick.his little patheic penis looked like a ZIT on that big nasty testicle....sometimes it would get so big it would be sticking out of his boxer shorts...looked like he was giving birth to the world's UGLIEST baby!!...he had it drained...over and over and over...and it cost hundreds of dollars every time...so now that he's delivering pizza and making 115 bucks a week plus tips...i seriously doubt he's had the money to have that nast thing drained!!...i bet THAT has really kept him from finding a new victim!!...i hope the damn thing gets so big he has to put it in a wagon and drag it along behind him.......i made sure to mention that on his datingpsycho's profile....
Apr 2 - 11AM (Reply to #49)
cynthia (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Why cant mine have this disorder?

I guess it doesnt matter anyway, their penis is of no use to anyone else but them in the long run, he can look at the gross fluid sack when he is getting himself off. You know what that is dont you? That is all that nasty shit festering inside them trying to get out. Too funny I would hate to order a pizza from him, ha ha
Apr 2 - 12PM (Reply to #50)
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

knock knock...hepatitis calling.....

yeah...he's delivering pizza for papa johns...and he looks like a WAX BANANA...he's YELLOW...gee...drug addict/alcoholic/yellow......let's see...what could that MEAN?...i sent them an anonymous fax...'yo..the drunk with the goatee is YELLOW..'...i even called the health department..but he's still out there...and get this...they have those drivers SLICE AND BOX those pizzas.....EWWWWWWWWWWWWW......
Apr 2 - 1PM (Reply to #51)
dysenchanted's picture

No More Pizza for Me

they have those drivers SLICE AND BOX those pizzas.....EWWWWWWWWWWWWW Ok. between this and the giant festering testicle...I am officially swearing off delivery pizza.
Apr 2 - 3PM (Reply to #53)
wallaby (not verified)
Anonymous's picture


OMG I will never eat a pizza delivered to my home again. SO freaking funny - wax banana - yo guy is YELLOW. LOL.
Apr 2 - 3PM (Reply to #52)
cynthia (not verified)
Anonymous's picture


remember Chicken F---er? These men not only destroy our lives but I WILL NEVER NEVER look at pizza and a chicken again the same way, they are even infecting our food. I would hate to piss off this yellow pizza man just think what he could put on those slices of pizza for extra toppings?
Apr 2 - 10AM (Reply to #48)
moving on
moving on's picture


That is the funniest thing I've heard in a while. Oh my god what the hell is going on with his balls? Man Karma has no limits huh? Haha in a wagon and drag it along behind him...LOL girl you crack me up!!!
Apr 2 - 10AM (Reply to #46)
quietude (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

omg narcnarc

OUCHIE... LMAO & spitting coffee out @ the baby and wagon comments...oh my!!! Normally, I'd be mortified that someone has an affliction like this, but for these guys, I think GOOD!(I hope God understands!)
Apr 2 - 12PM (Reply to #47)
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

his 'little problem'....

i bet his 'little problem' is getting bigger by the day.......and guess what???....that's MY FAULT TOO!!!..yep...actually he blames it on the dogs...'if YOU taught those dogs not to jump up on people..this wouldn't have happened to me!!..it's because of YOU allowing them to jump up and hit me in the nuts'......bullshit...... i do...i hope it gets the size of state fair award winning PUMPKIN.....then explodes.... i have no mercy for him...exploding testicle...liver cancer..he deserves it.....
Apr 1 - 4PM
Empathy's picture

Mine used me for sex with other men and women

I reckon he only married me for the IMAGE of being married to a blonde as I fitted HIS critera. Then as I had enough money to buy a house for us. Then for me to have HIS kids and raise them and continue to work full time and pay for EVERYTHING and be a perfect wife and mother. THEN for the threesomes and sex with the other men and women HE wanted me to either have sex with or to lure them in for HIM. Gee iam so glad i woke up to him finally and said NO more and bought him out / told the world what he did and made him a social outcast in the local community. Now he's left town and thinks HE's won. LMAO!!!
Mar 31 - 9PM
tasha's picture


Someone to hold him over until something better came along. Someone to nurse his ego and feel sorry for him. Someone to have sex with. Someone that would listen to his ranting a ravings about his exes!!! In short a doormat!
Mar 31 - 7PM
joeP's picture

I had....

I ride a Harley and was a member of a club. I think she liked getting the respect, by association, she definately didn't earn it. I also had a good paying high tech job. She had a soso paying job when I met her. She told me her boss was always hittiing on her. She used to get into screaming matches with him. I think she used him for supply big time, I think there was something going on there. But I digress. I am very generous by nature and I don't fret over material things. When we started going out I told her I would treat her like my equal. That what's mine is hers.... She didn't listen to hardley anything I had too say but her ears perked up when she heard that. I swear they are like cats when it comes to hearing what they want to hear. Thier ears perk up and almost point to the direction of thier prey. She didn't hear the treat as an equal part that's for sure..... I bought her a wardrobe of clothes, presents - too many too count, Gave her a large sum of cash to help her out, took her to plays, concerts, movies, weekends on the beach, fixed her car, etc... Always on my dime of course. She never paid for a thing... In a nutshell, the above was what I was used for.
Mar 30 - 12AM
happylark's picture


Aside from the usual cooking, cleaning, laundry, financial support, etc. for which I have never received any thanks or praise (and know I never will), I now realize my primary function was to raise his two children from his previous marriage, so that he was free to do whatever he chose to do. Fourteen years later and a lot wiser, I'm now ready for this to be over. This is just the beginning and I know I have a long, bumpy road ahead of me!!
Mar 29 - 11PM
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

mine dated men!!

the psychonarc chased after men...he's totally asexual..but an equal opportunity predator.... he's not gay..he's not straight..he's not bi... he's a piece of sh!t......
Mar 31 - 2PM (Reply to #40)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture


most Sexual Narcs are ANYSexuals... any orifice will do. ~~~~~~~~~ The world is a dangerous place, not only because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing. - Albert Einstein Visit My Info. Website for Abuse Victims
Mar 31 - 10AM (Reply to #24)
enoughalready's picture


I always wondered if my exN was asexual. What were the signs and how did u find out?
Apr 1 - 9AM (Reply to #25)
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture


the fist clue was when he refused to have sex on our wedding night...telling me that he did not 'perform on occasions of forced gaiety'..!!...no..i take that back... the first clue was that after the initial putting out to sucker me in, he seemed to not care one way or another..any sex we ever had after the initial con job, i had to initiate..and then eventually he started to withhold sex...withheld sex for YEARS..that's when i knew FOR SURE he was off his rocker.........and i NEVER once heard him say he found someone attractive.in the physical sense....man or woman...he NEVER said..'wow, she's really beautiful'..for awhile i thought maybe he was gay...but he didn't find men attractive either...not in a physical sexual way...it was all about a PREDATOR seeking a VICTIM...he's not human and he doesn't view humans as HUMAN BEINGS...as being multi dimensioanl...we're just PREY......
Apr 1 - 11AM (Reply to #26)
Nothanx's picture

Mine was opposite but also the same

Mine used to be hyper sexual. He would constantly comment on other women. When he first started doing this it made me furious, and I explained to him how disrespectful he was being. He said "I am working on that. I just can't help when I see a lady with a big butt or in nice clothes I get crazy". So he would make comments about how hard other women made him, and even how hot he thought I was, but when it came time to perform sexually he always had an excuse not to. Then he would nonchalantly explain "well sorry I already masturbated like 4 times today". This made me crazy because he knew that he would be staying at my house for the weekend, and that my kids are going to be gone. They only spend every other weekend with their dad, so I just thought for sure he would be super ready for sex like I was. YEARS OF THIS!!!!!
Apr 1 - 11PM (Reply to #39)
wallaby (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

The multitude of ways

in which they drive us crazy. Nothanx I just read this and had to laugh. I mean they all are all so incredibly obnoxious - but I hadn't heard this particular permutation of perversity before! God they suck.
Apr 1 - 9PM (Reply to #38)
running's picture

not sure

Mine sent me a video text of him mastubating. I remember thinking it was pretty strange, but laughed it off. He would tell me he had the healthiest prostate around because he made sure he got off every day, either with me or without me. I was used for emotional unloading, sex , ranting, isolation, dressing up, a dinner mate...but never cooking, cleaning or laundry. He would never let me do anything for him, I don't think he wanted to feel guilty.
Apr 1 - 4PM (Reply to #27)
cynthia (not verified)
Anonymous's picture


They are sooo sick, and that is pure abuse to a partner. Not only do they cheat with other people, they cheat on us sexually with themselves. They could care less about others needs in EVERY respect.
Apr 2 - 12AM (Reply to #28)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

respect is not in their toolbox

Not only do they cheat with other people, they cheat on us sexually with themselves I know one therapist told exNH that his sexual withholding (including his NEVER MASTURBATING because he HATES it) was a type of cheating - he flipped out... but that was BANG ON! Psycho-Boy sent one of his girlfriends a video of himself masturbating in his home bathroom while his wife was asleep in the next room! He sent me and others endless pictures of his penis - just DISGUSTING. He'd then say - "you make me feel that I HAVE to send this to you" or "I showed you mine now show me yours" BLARGGH!!! Oh and one odd thing - one of his girlfriends told me Psycho-Boy played her a recording that he said he took from porn - he told her he saved it because it "sounded just like her when they have sex." Later, she found out - the recording might VERY WELL be of his WIFE! She was peeved she deleted it... she said he said some stupid things later that led her believe he records himself & his wife and plays it back all the time. ~~~~~~~~~ The world is a dangerous place, not only because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing. - Albert Einstein Visit My Info. Website for Abuse Victims
Apr 2 - 8AM (Reply to #31)
cynthia (not verified)
Anonymous's picture


isnt that a nice title, geez anyway mine would always say after he pulled it out, isnt that the best dick you have ever seen, did you ever feel a dick in ya that felt that good baby, ya ya ya its the biggest one eyed monster I have ever seen - get over yourself already, its just a penis and besides in about 5 minutes it will shrink and go limp
Apr 2 - 8AM (Reply to #32)
aceonelady's picture


My ex N would say ...Take this precious dick baby,it is hard and soft....and my cum is like silk....WTF!!! is soft and soft...and small...


Apr 2 - 8PM (Reply to #33)
running's picture


You know, it's Friday night, and I'm home alone and feeling sad, so I turned on the computer because you all make me feel so good! At this time on a Friday night we would be doing it, he would say "only you make me this hard baby, this big, I want to cum all over you"....and he would! Then he'd clean up and leave, I would cry after he left, (I made the mistake of giving him shit once for leaving me), so I cried after he left. He would always call me Saturday around 11, (like clock work) to see how I was. Kept me hanging for the rest of the weekend, probably waiting to see if something better came along. I'm not sad tonight! I'm happy I turned on my computer because I know what I'm missing....being treated badly!
Apr 2 - 9PM (Reply to #37)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

same sh*t...

only you make me this hard baby, this big, I want to c*m all over you Psycho-Boy used to say this same thing to me all the time... so I got so disgusted I finally got up the nerve to say "my what an affectionate, loving & respectful thing to say!" - He didn't speak to me for over a month after that. ~~~~~~~~~ The world is a dangerous place, not only because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing. - Albert Einstein Visit My Info. Website for Abuse Victims
Apr 2 - 8PM (Reply to #34)
enoughalready's picture


Yes-it's Friday and a holiday weekend. I have thought of the same things as well. You are not alone, we are all here feeling the same or have felt the same. I come to this site too and it picks me up! Keep your head up:-)
Apr 2 - 8PM (Reply to #35)
running's picture


Thanks enough already, It's especially hard this weekend because my daughter is with her Father, who thankfully isn't the XN. We divorced 9 years ago for many other reasons. At least I know she's being well taken care of and loved. Have a great holiday weekend!