This is BIG!
This is BIG!
I have not posted here in a few mths, BUT I do check in about once a week now. If you remember me or my story, I left a N abuser of a husband that I was with for 10 yrs. 3 kids. We left first of June. ANYWAY, when I found this site, I literally was on here every few hrs or so....it was truly my lifeline. My entire family supported me and were here, but all of you on this site, who share my same story, saved me. I had the months of sleepless nights, the PTSD and visceral reactions when my phone would ring and I would want it to be him....the abuser....the one I finally left. I went thru all the psychosis that was handed to me. I did it with medication too, but I did it. Within days of me telling him I was leaving him, he had a girlfriend. My BIGGEST FEAR during that period of time was, "Oh God, what if they live the happiest life ever, they are soul mates and she is perfect and he is truly happy because of her".....that would mean that this was all my fault and that I do have a problem like he always projected on me.
Well sweethearts....it might take some time, but good always wins, and narcs ALWAYS devalue, and he did it within a very short period of time with her. I ran into her during the summer.....absolutely beautiful, 10 yrs younger than me, no kids, perfect figure......I thought he found his soulmate. Well, this soulmate who he also professed his undying love to within weeks of leaving a 10 yr marriage, they are done. They are so done in fact that now he talks terrible about her......calls her "Stupid", like thats her name.....says he hates all women now after her........ and the only people he cares for are the kids and I. Why he cares for us now I don't know.....he never did before.....oh wait, I know why! He is a narc, and is getting no supply from her, and he is a drama junky. I can't believe how much he shame dumped on me. Now that I am away from it, it really was a sick situation. Anyway, this is getting long. I had to check in and write this for you all who are going thru that point in recovery where you really wonder who the crazy mean one is? Is it you? Will he do this to someone else? I remember being on here begging and crying for someone, anyone to promise me he will do it again, and that it wasn't me. God bless you all tonight. If he is a true narc, whoever you are healing from, you will see it play out. I have to admit something.....I have had an inner calm in me since I have seen this play out with this idiot, a calm I haven't had in years. I think it's called validation.
tigger
tigger
tigger
Jaycee
Thanks for sharing these
Tigger73
Aceonelady
It is so BIG - surviving
almostlydia
Valadation
Oh my dearheart, I remember
Tigger
You are not a victim, you
tigger
almostlydia