So, about my husband
So, about my husband
Okay, so I was involved with a narcissist... the classic, charming type. We were soulmates, then we weren't. Just to be clear to those of you have been cheated on, I don't think affairs are okay or anything...something I thought I would never ever do...but after 15 years of emotional abuse from my alcoholic husband, I was ripe for one I guess. And Mr Perfect sure seemed like the answer... The sad thing is I see now how he took advantage of how vulnerable I was. The happy thing is he really changed my life for the better overall, because he gave me love and hope and I started to stand up to my H...it hurt when he broke my heart, but I was not going back to the way life was, either.
So I've wondered if my H is a N or not...my counselor and I have briefly discussed borderline maybe instead...I don't know they kind of run together. The reason I didn't think of H as a N...is because he isn't the confident charmer, etc, he didn't sweep me off my feet. BUT..he IS fake. And after reading a lot of stuff on the Narcissists Suck blog...about the family tyrant and the Mob Family, etc. I am inclined to think he's just a different type.
Looking at his family, they are super controlling, and I'd have to say his dad is a narcissist. There is only one way...their way. They can't tolerate any individuality. They are like a mob family! My husband can be nice acting sometimes, but he has no empathy for me. I think he sees me as an extension of him.
When my family got wiped out in Katrina he told me not to let that stuff bother me. He refused to talk about it or offer any comfort. When I was recently diagnosed with ADD and depression, he just got mad. When I try to talk with him about it he gets mad. He told me he can't handle my problems. He's mostly concerned about how much my medication costs. It really bothers him that we are spending money on medicine for me. Meanwhile he's a fricking hypochondriac. It really IS all about HIM.
He is also a real Jekyll/Hyde type. It seems like a lot of N's talked about are just assholes all the time, he just switches back and forth. Everyone else "out there" thinks he's the nicest guy in the world. Women have frequently told me over the years "you're so lucky!!!" which has always made me want to scream.
I won't go on and on. I came here to get over the intense relationship I had with the textbook N...the one I can't resist, but I think I need to start working on what to do about the one that I can't stand!! And his oppressive family..that tells you every day how much they love you (as long as you do as you're told) and then they screw you over.
so much in common
gaslighting
gotta fly
Well, I'm home. He's passed
Better Off
Today is full of apologies,
apologies
I don't know. He wears me
Your comments were great.
sad
OMG
http://hubpages.com/hub/Married-to-a-Narcissist?preview
nolongercontrolled
hurts for now
Stay away
I am doing okay. Luckily
Better Off - Congrats
Characteristics of a Narcissist
Quiet narcissists
Narcissists have no time for mere mortals
Even when they're tranparent...
why are We attracted to them?
Why We are Attracted...
thanks so much for the replies
Why....
wow
Narcissists seek strong women
so well said!
You are welcome
I just ordered WOMEN WHO
http://hubpages.com/hub/Married-to-a-Narcissist?preview
nolongercontrolled
Yes, cassie may...they are
Keep in mind, they WANTED us