Narcissist Recovery Blog

What is a Narcissist? Tell a Sister on Valentine's Day!!!

All month I've been trying to think about what kind of gift I could give you all for Valentine's Day and then it finally hit me, the gift of knowledge is something each one of us can pass on to one another. Knowledge is power!

With that in mind, I wrote this blog in hopes that anyone who reads it will pass it on to a friend or post it on their FB or Twitter feed.

In the spirit of sisterhood, please help us build awareness this Valentine's Day and "Tell a Sister" by sharing this or any of your favorite blogs or posts from our forum with others who would benefit from such knowledge.

What is a narcissist....and are you dating one?

Catfishing and What We Can Learn from the Manti Te'O Scandal about Narcissism

According to Wikipedia:

“In the wake of the Manti Te'o girlfriend scandal, the term "Catfish" has entered common parlance to describe a person who engages someone in a fake relationship online, and the act of perpetrating such a hoax is now known as catfishing.

Catfish is a 2010 American documentary film, directed by Henry Joost and Ariel Schulman, involving a young man being filmed by his brother and friend as he builds a romantic relationship with a young woman on the social networking website Facebook.

Lance Armstrong and the Real 'F' Word...

"I did call her crazy. And I think she'd be OK with me saying this. I'm going to take the liberty to say it. I said, 'Listen, I called you crazy, I called you a b*&%$, I called you all these things, but I never called you fat.' She thought I said (she was) a fat crazy b*&%$. I never said (she was) fat."

This interesting piece of dialogue keeps running through my head like a bad Justin Bieber song...(wait, are there any good Justin Bieber songs?)...

...Okay. Focus here. Don't make it worse.

The above paragraph is a direct quote from Lance Armstrong in response to a question by Oprah in part one of the highly anticipated and very telling interview with the fallen cycling star.

Lance Armstrong's Narcissism

Lance Armstrong....Is He or Isn’t He a Narcissist? That seems to be the million dollar question right now in light of his recent admission on Oprah that he did in fact dope for years, yet threatened and sued anyone who tried to challenge his assertions that he was clean.

The vengeance with which he went after those who challenged him is incomprehensible to me and is what has me exploring his personality right now. I mean, it’s one thing to lie and cheat, but then to go so far as ruin the lives of people who were simply telling the truth is beyond callous to me.

To help us understand his behavior, I will be interviewing Joseph Burgo, PhD. who recently wrote an excellent article in the Atlantic on Lance’s narcissism.



Women helping women. Women loving women.

I have heard many women say, they get along much better with men than they do with women. Some say they don't trust women. Many women with the N are jealous or bitter towards the OW. The Narc gives you so little that it may be easy to fall into this trap and blame the OW for what he is doing or not doing. Easy to think he must love her more or perhaps she is better than you somehow, not the case. She is just like you in many ways.

There may be a variety of reasons why some women don't like or trust OW, in general.

My father was a N/P and my Mom drank to deal with the pain of his cold insensitive cruel ways.

A New Outlook for a New Year!

"If you carry the same baggage you had this year into the New Year, your ability to move forward will be weighed down. Drop your bags at the doorstop of the old year, so you can make a change in the new."
~ Eugene Nathaniel Butler

We often upset ourselves as a result of how we choose to RESPOND to life. Most disturbance comes from the belief that we should be able to control others in an attempt to control ourselves. Unfortunately, what we fail to realize is the only person we can control is ourselves.
This new year, instead of focusing on what you cannot change or control, I encourage you to focus your efforts on that which you can control. It is not WHAT HAPPENS to us, but HOW WE RESPOND to it that determines our happiness and success in life.

Getting off the Endangered Species List

“It is the darkness that makes the light visible, and not the other way around.”
--Nancy Venable Raine

I don’t like all this “becoming.” Six years of becoming someone I don’t recognize. But of all the things I have “become,” I am at the do-or-die transformation now. Being Pain Queen doesn’t work any more. Pain Queen is on her last leg. And she just can’t take any more pain. So I must become a person who does not desire it. Who doesn’t seek it. Doesn’t turn to it. Doesn’t count on it. Doesn’t accept it as a permanent affliction.

I must become a person who does not love HIM. Who couldn’t possibly love a man who has brought me so much pain. I must stop thinking I love him. It’s just too twisted to “love” the source of my pain...

"Simple Gifts" for Christmas

"'Tis the gift to be simple, 'tis the gift to be free
'Tis the gift to come down where we ought to be,
And when we find ourselves in the place just right,
'Twill be in the valley of love and delight."
~ Joseph Brackett

As I help my mom prepare Christmas Eve dinner, I look to my right and see this verse of a “Shaker Song” framed as my mom often likes to do with her favorite quotes. "Simple Gifts" is a perfect reminder for the season of what is important and what we should cherish.

While many here are in pain at the moment, I want you to know that although the path may be hard at times, you are exactly where you need to be right now. You have seen the light and you are making progress to gain the love and respect in a relationship that you DESERVE.

WHY it is easy for me NOT to think about the Narc or others like him this year.......

In response to Pumpkin's beautiful enlightening post:

We just lost 20 children. 20 of our own in this country. I attended a prayer service for all involved at church on Saturday evening.

I got up and spoke about the LOST BOYS in our society and how it is our responsibility to look out for the warning signs if we see young boys in danger of becoming detatched.

What can we do? What can we do to help the MOTHER's who are so obsessed with their whacko husbands and boyfriends that they can no longer see the forest through the tree's.

The Gift of Gratitude

Today we celebrate and give thanks for all we are grateful for here in the states. I want to take this opportunity to thank each of you for being a pillar of strength for one another here on The Path Forward.

The way in which you support one another here is so inspiring. In a modern world full of chaos and conflict, you each restore my faith in the true goodness and humanity of all women and mankind. ;)

Please take today to be grateful for the abundance in your life. Although many here are going through an extremely painful time in life, it is important to always remember our blessings.

Going to chapel and we're going to get married

Marriage... As they say planning for the wedding is the easy part.. It's the challenges of two people who love each other as a couple " FOR BETTER OR WORSE".

And believe you me some days are worse then better..

Marriage is the respect that two people have for one another.. It's all about give and take.. BALANCE..

Now throw in life " life is like a box of chocolates " jobs, family, finances , health.. You get out what you put in...

We are born innocent, a blank slate.. As we grow we face life..( I think that's why vacations are necessary) GOOD VS EVIL..a loving partner is well worth facing life..

One must understand the grim reaper is walking the earth.. The forbidden fruit.. Or we can simply call him "THE NARCISSIST" ( I call him the Dog Whisperer )